The random thoughts of an architect-turned- lawyer from the deep south living in Washington, DC...
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Missed Connection?I eyed the Metro seat as the train slowed to a stop. I sure do love traveling when it is not rush hour. I entered the train and as I spun around to sit, I immediately noticed you watching me. We briefly made eye contact then I coyly looked away. I could feel you still gazing at me. At the next stop, I looked up from my paper and you were looking out the window. I noticed your hair. You had very nice hair. You seemed a bit older, but still had a youthful element to your appearance. It has been a while since I noticed anyone so it felt nice to just take it in. You turned to catch me looking and I quickly looked back at my paper. I knew I was busted. I glanced up again and you were smiling. You had a very warm smile. I couldn't help but smile too. Our eyes lingered on each other. We both kept smiling. I was two stops from my destination. I wondered about you. Were you on your way to work? Where are you from? Is there a lucky lady in your life? The next stop was my stop. I began gathering up my things and gave up my seat for the duration of the ride. I saw you watching me. I wondered if you would get off at my stop to strike up a conversation. The train was slowing down and I looked back one last time. You were still staring intently at me, only now you had your finger halfway up your nose.
As I stepped off the Metro I thought to myself "is THIS the dating scene I have to look forward to in D.C? I am so not ready."
Monday, February 26, 2007
You got me through thisI guess it takes a break-up to realize what truly amazing people you have in your life. Truth be told, I already knew what amazing people I have in my life. I just had the opportunity in recent weeks to really reflect on it. I have seen firsthand what good friends can do for a girl. For example, a good friend might show up at your house with a bottle of vodka on the night of your breakup...
...or, send you break-up balloons:
...or provide a beverage at her party especially for you when you give up drinking for Lent:
...or fill your inbox and cell phone with such sweet messages:
I heard you mentioning a variety of unhappy facts about a relationship...I'm sorry to hear that...I wanted to offer lunch or coffee or something along those lines early next week.
I was thinking about what you said today and I know you have a million friends but if you ever need to talk or anything let me know
You and I both know there's nothing I can say here to make it better...Just let me know if need that ear or shoulder, alright?
How are you - I know that if this is something you are doing or have done it was truly hard. Let me know you are O.K.
I know you have a lot of friends looking out for you, but if you want to just blow off steam to someone I am available.
I don't even need to hear the break-up story. I'm ready to jump on a plane now and beat the shit out of him.
I hope you're doing ok. If I was there, I'd take you out for some beers & wine and some Erotic Photo Hunt.
Darlin', you doing ok? If you want to talk/vent/whatever, you know where I am.
You know I am always happy to be a listener when you are ready for one.
Well I am thinking of you and I am here if you need me.
You have a beautiful smile so don't hide it too long.
I'm sorry, is there anything I can do to help?
In reflecting on all of this I realized something really important: he would have never fit into my life here. The people around me have set the bar way too high and I doubt he would ever have reached it. You are such amazing people and I am one damn lucky girl. Thank you.
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
Pick your jaw up off the ground and wish me luckIn a strange turn of events and possibly insane move on my part: I am giving up alcohol for Lent.
Sunday, February 18, 2007
MeEvery time I think I'm going to be okay...and I begin to settle into the comfort of moving on...the tears come back. I feel like I am fighting with myself right now. I am fighting the "me" that I was before him. That me had strong walls built of hurt and cynicism and experience. Yet, that me was strong and content and looking forward to life. She was okay.
He changed the me that I knew. I saw something in myself with him that I had never seen before and I had just enough time to settle in. I was comfortable and happy and warm. I didn't need the walls. I didn't need to pretend. I fell in love not only with him, but with the "me" I was with him. I now realize that I was that person because of him. I can't be that person without him. I don't know how.
So although I was ready to give her up for good, the old "me" comes back. I go back to being strong and independent. I go back to pretending.
Thursday, February 15, 2007
Mardi GrasRemember last year when I got to wear that huge head thingy and freeze my arse off while riding on the back of a convertible and doing that funny little waving thing? Remember how I got to skip school and start drinking at like 2pm? Remember how people all day long called me queen and brought me everything that I wanted eat or drink? And I had my very own jester.
Yeah, that was fun.
Although I am not allowed to continue my reign as queen this year (damnit), I will be riding on one of the floats and throwing out lots-o-beads. The Clarendon Mardi Gras parade has really grown in the past five years to become something worth checking out. Seriously. As a charter member of the Krewe of Louisiana, I have watched this parade grow from a few local workers in their cars to multiple floats and thousands of intoxicated revelers in the streets of North Arlington.
So come out next Tuesday (February 20th) for what will assuredly be a great time. You are also cordially invited to an after party at Tallula. I should mention that Tallula is run by a real Louisianian and I assure you, he does it up right. (Marci and Hammer can attest to the good times that can be had at that after party.)
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Candy-gramsAs I have mentioned in the past, my law school gives out Valentine's candy grams. They are usually more snarky and less romantic. I had completely forgotten about this until this morning when I went to get my paper from last semester that my prof. put in my mailbox. I was pleasantly surprised to find a couple of candy grams in my box. I was even more pleasantly surprised when I read this one from a good friend:
Top 10 Reasons Why Law School is Like a Shitty Significant Other
1) You're happy and excited in the beginning.
2) You keep giving them money, and you are not sure you will get it back.
3) They make you feel guilty when you don't spend all of your time with them.
4) They make you feel like you're the crazy one when it's really them.
5) No matter what you do, it's never good enough.
6) You keep thinking "Maybe it will get better".
7) They make you miss all your favorite TV shows.
8) You know you should pay attention, but they just keep going on and on about boring stuff.
9) You wonder if you're going to get out without permanent emotional damage.
10) Drinking makes it all better.
Fabulous. Thanks for the candy grams, kids!!! Oh, and thanks Marci for that bottle of red wine you brought over on Saturday. It will come in handy tonight as I test the truthfulness of #10.
Props to the Feminist Forum for this very timely candy gram.
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Bring it on!
I cannot express to you how needed a snow day is in my life right now. Really. Sitting on my sofa for an entire day in my pajamas, drinking hot chocolate, watching bad television, and NOT contemplating my "break-up" sounds absolutely divine right now. And what better day than February 14th, right? Seriously, forget these flurries, just dump it already!
Thursday, February 08, 2007
Let's Talk PolygamyI am writing a paper this semester about various cultural views on polygamy. Here in America, the majority of us tend to think there is something inherently "wrong" about practicing polygamy. (Putting legal issues aside.) Even beyond our borders, in some cultures that legally allow taking multiple wives or husbands, it is not widely practiced nor accepted.
I have read about the historical roots and reasons for polygamy. I also have scholarly articles that discuss the positive and negative affects of such practices. But I have yet to get to the heart of the matter. I would therefore like to pose the following question to my scholarly readers:
What is it about the practice of polygamy that you find so fundamentally unacceptable? Or do you?
To get you started, here are some of the arguments I have come across so far in my research:
- in times of war resulting in a decrease of the male population, polygamy is a way to ensure the culture survives
- in areas where it is shameful for a woman to not be married, polygamy is a way for all women to find husbands
- men are polygamous by nature, better to allow polygamy in a formal setting than an adulterous one
- considering instances of polygny (men with multiple wives) is much more common - extremely unfair to women
- basic family values are lost - relationships must be monogamous to survive
*NOTE* I am focussing on of-age consensual polygamous relationships (none involving children, kidnapping, rape, or cases of multiple spouses that do not know about each other)
P.S. I will erase non-serious commentary. (ahem, Butler)
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
First Ever WonL EndorsementI experienced something in the District of Columbia recently that I have never before encountered and I feel the need to share. This past Friday evening, I got together with a couple of lovely ladies and a husband and a brother (neither of which belonged to me) to indulge in a few adult beverages. We chose to head to Barrack's Row and meet up at Finn mac Cool's. Never having been to this area, I was quite impressed, and not just because of the abundance of Marines. We were lucky to snag six seats front and center at the bar. After saying our hellos we picked our seats and turned to order our drinks. The place was not THAT busy, but the bartender seemed swamped. As time went on, we realized he was not really busy at all, merely ignoring us. In a sometimes typical DC bartender fashion he was playing the "yeah, I'll get around to serving you when I damn well please" game.
Of course, as time went on and the ice from our first round was melting, we got a tad impatient. We let our frustration be known in the usual passive aggressive ways which included loud sighing and bitching to each other about the service industry around here. Then something downright amazing happened. The bartender came right up to our group and said "hey, I've been acting like a jerk all night and I'm sorry. I got in a fight with my fiance and it wasn't fair for me to take it out on you. What kind of shots would you like?" Bartender then proceeded to make up six free shots for our group. After that, we were all like one big happy family trying to help Bartender understand women and the fight with his lady. So, in an unprecedented move, I have decided for the first time ever to endorse a D.C. drinking establishment solely due to the service.
Go to Finn mac Cools.