The random thoughts of an architect-turned- lawyer from the deep south living in Washington, DC...
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
FearI am having a cortizone epidural in my spine today and I am scared.
I am not scared of the local anesthetic. I am not scared of the large epidural needle. I am not scared of the fact that they have to move over my sciatic nerve to get to my herniated disc. I am not scared of my decision to forgo sedation for this procedure. I am not scared of the pain of today.
I am scared this will not work. I am scared that even after today I will still not be able to bend over and pick up my dog or clean my bathroom floors. I am scared that after today, sitting, laying down, and standing will still hurt. I am scared that after today I will still have to stop and catch my breath a few times an hour. I am scared that after today, I will still have to live with this dabilitating pain that makes getting through my days so difficult.