The random thoughts of an architect-turned- lawyer from the deep south living in Washington, DC...

Monday, February 04, 2008

Karma's got my back

I am sometimes amazed at the level of jackassedness I encounter on my morning metro ride. I got onto the metro during rush hour and luckily there were a few seats. Of course, there were also a few folks that obviously never got the metro-etiquitte memo. Seriously dude, I don't care about your cleaning of the mold off the baseboards in your bathroom over the weekend. Judging by the look on your friend's face, he didn't care either.

Where was I? Oh yeah, I find a seat and decide to take it. It's an empty seat on the inside that is blocked by a bitchy looking woman in the aisle seat. I approach her. She looks up at me, obviously unwilling to budge. I raise my eyebrows and point to the seat as if to ask, with merely the look on my face, "why are you blocking a seat during rush hour?" She seems unfazed. She moves her right knee 1/2" as if to signify to me "you can have the seat, but I ain't moving." I fumble my way into the seat "accidentally" turning just in time to hit her with my bag. Oops.

As I pretend to read the paper, I ponder my increasing annoyance with this woman. What to do? I mean, I could dramatically turn the pages of the Express and hit her, but that won't do any good because then she goes off thinking that I am the rude one. I could sigh or huff and puff, but again, I end up looking like the jackass. Maybe I should just tell her something. Not in a rude way...polite rather. I should politely let her know that she is not following proper metro-etiquitte. Yes, for metro riders everywhere, I need to take a stand and let her know that her aisle-seat-hogging is unacceptable during rush hour.

At that moment, I notice her head jerk to the side. I look over to find karma. He is in the form of a kid in the aisle facing the other direction with an extremely large backpack that is positioned mere inches from her face. For the next four stops, every time this kid moved, outer-seat-hog had to duck and dodge his books until she finally got nailed in the face and asked him to move. For the next four stops, I giggled. It took everything in me not to point out that she was the one who so boldly laid claim to the aisle seat. I doubt she learned anything from getting hit by karma but it sure did make me feel good.

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