The random thoughts of an architect-turned- lawyer from the deep south living in Washington, DC...

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Vermin problem

My law school was invaded today. These pests came from out of nowhere, easily made their ways into our classrooms, and even seemed to multiply. I personally watched separate attempts by two professors to get rid of these intruders to no avail. (Correction, Prof. K eventually got rid of them, but not before the class began chanting about the 4th Amendment.)

No roaches or ants or termites. Nope, those I could handle. These pests were smut-pushers and they were sent by this crazy guy. Being that I am a Republican in a liberal DC law school, I am accustomed to banter that is less than flattering to the current administration. However, 'Dick Cheney is Satan's son and Alito is their lost incestuous love child' is not a part of the intelligent discussions that usually ensue around the law school. I have to pass these fools daily at Foggy Bottom, but a quick spin of the IPod wheel can tune them out. When they are standing in front of my classroom and class begins in two minutes, no such luck.

I first encountered the youth cult members when they were passing around magazines and voicing uneducated viewpoints to my Criminal Procedure class. When it was time for class to begin, Prof. K politely told them it was time for them to leave. They did not seem to agree as they continued their preaching. I was actually appalled at the inappropriate manner in which they addressed (and ignored) a professor of his stature, or at any level for that matter. About an hour later, I encountered a group of four of them in a yelling match with students and Prof. M. These morons kept going on about how the students here were being lied to and we all needed to face what was really going on (um, that apparently aliens were living among us). They spoke as if they believed they had a much better grasp on current events and the Supreme Court nominations than we or our professors did. Really? At a top law school in our nation's Capitol? Do you really think so?

A few of the things about the way in which the cult members were attempting to elicit support really struck me. First off, I believe that it is common sense that if you want someone to listen to what you have to say, you do not begin by calling them ill-educated, money wasting, lying students-of-the-law who have no grasp of reality or of the political process. It will also not help to follow up with how your cult can help them. Chances are, they quit listening to after you told them their tuition money was wasted. Second, if you are going to attempt to argue law and politics with people, you may want to know a little about who you are taking on.

Quick run-down of the two Profs I noticed the cult members in contact with today: Prof. K is a contributor on the extremely popular Volokh Conspiracy (a blog about legal and political issues), has degrees from Stanford, Harvard, and Princeton, has written articles in every prestigious Law Review around and clerked for Supreme Court Justice Kennedy. Prof. M clerked for Supreme Court Justices Kennedy and Thomas, got both of his degrees from Harvard and is an Officer in the US Army Reserve.

I watched these youth stand before these two professors at different times being inconsiderate and disrespectful, even going as far as to challenge one to a debate so his students could learn "the real truth". You will have to excuse me if I chose to learn what is "really" going on with our government and Supreme Court from former SCOTUS clerks and not some pamplet-holding children who went to cult-training for a week with a quack who preaches outside of the Metro. I must commend both professors for maintaining their composure throughout. Personally, I probably would have kicked the vermin had I been close enough.