WonL
The random thoughts of an architect-turned- lawyer from the deep south living in Washington, DC...
Thursday, May 03, 2007
Looking back for a moment...looking forward forever.
I just finished law school. I mean, I just turned in my last paper and...oh my gawd, I just finished law school. I knew this day would come, but at the same time, I never dreamed this day would come. I'm sitting here with a glass of champagne reflecting on all that it took to get me here. These feelings are familiar. Turning in that last paper brought me back to another time. Another accomplishment. Another glimpse into me:
So many words could describe the emotions I encountered in those ninety minutes. I had always been dramatic and this was just another performance, although there was much more riding on this than any play or dance recital. I was also filled with excitement and anticipation of showing everyone what I had accomplished over the last five years. It all boiled down to the one-hour I had to express to everyone the thoughts and ideas that drove this project. I was so overwhelmed thinking of all that I had gone through to get here, and how close I came to not making it. It had been a long road, but today was my chance to shine.
I glanced out over the familiar faces in the room. I stood there, my stomach in knots and my hands shaking in front of professors, local architects, and classmates and I began to present my thesis. Everyone in that room knew how much work I had put into this project and, more importantly, how much was riding on it. This pass/fail presentation would determine my degree. With my emotions riding high, I spent an hour trying to get everyone in that room to see things through my eyes. After completing my presentation, I stepped outside to allow the panel to decide my fate. Never had seven minutes lasted so long. As I attempted to distract myself from the swelling anxiety, I began to reflect upon how I came to stand outside that classroom.
Architecture school was the first thing in my life that did not come naturally to me. This whole new way of “thinking outside the box” was a foreign concept. After breezing through high school, barely opening books, I figured college would be the same. I was wrong. When I entered architecture school, I went from being the smart one, to being the one that just could not get it. During my second year of architecture school, one of my professors actually pulled me into his office to tell me I should think of pursuing a different degree. He told me, “this field is not meant for everyone; some people never get it.”
I stood there, frozen in disbelief. I had never ‘not been good enough’ for anything in my life. I had never even come close to being faced with the thought of quitting. I decided at that moment that there was no way I was going to be a part of those that just never got it. From then on, I was determined to do whatever it took to prove to everyone, including myself, that I could accomplish whatever I set my mind to.
Over the three years that followed, I went through a growth process I could never have anticipated. I spent countless all-nighters weeding through projects and drawings with mounting frustrations, pulling back on my social life and missing holidays. I also learned that professor’s critiques were tests of endurance and persistence, both of which I needed to build up. I realized just how hard I had to work to get through this. But more importantly, I realized that I had it in me.
The minutes continued to inch along as I stood outside that classroom waiting for the Director to come and reveal my fate. I remember every feeling leading up to that moment, but cannot remember the moment itself: the moment I received “the handshake” that meant that I had passed Thesis and would be graduating with a Bachelor of Architecture. Little did I know at the time the true meaning of that handshake. It did not necessarily mean that I would become a world-famous designer, or someday own an architecture firm, or even enjoy working in that field. It meant that when dealt this challenge, I handled it with enthusiasm and determination. Receiving that handshake acknowledged the transformation I had made into a more committed and hard-working person and it meant that I was now ready to conquer anything that came my way. I needed to go through those experiences in architecture school to become the person I am today: a person who is truly prepared for this next challenge. I am not only ready, but I also firmly believe that my undergraduate experiences will help me to excel as both a law school student and someday, as an attorney.
That’s the letter I sent to GW Law school (in the form of a personal statement) over three years ago. Apparently, someone over there believed in me because they gave me a chance. More importantly, in a few weeks, they will be giving me a diploma. Because ladies and gentlemen, I got my law school handshake today.
Labels: Life in General, Makes you think, School
Friday, April 27, 2007
Exam-state-of-mind
I have an exam on Monday and an exam on Tuesday. Today is Friday (although I just found this out)...and I have already lost all ability to function.I have not been able to type properly or in coherent sentences for days. (This one took me F"OUR tries.)
Yesterday, I found myself writing letters to myself on a notepad because I bought pretty new pens. I love bright colors. Now I have "Laura B. loves her new pens" written over 25 times in bright colors sitting next to me.
I got in a fight with a bug yesterday. (An actual crawly bug.) He crawled a wee bit too close to my coffee. Curse words were yelled.
I woke up in the middle of the night, TV on, VCR still playing. I apparently cannot tell reality from non-reality because when I heard Alex yell "quick, get Dr. Montgomery-Shepard!" I ran out of bed to go get her.
I have been in my pajamas for five straight days. Granted, I have showered here and there. Then, put my pajamas back on.
Normal cycle: shampoo, rinse, condition, rinse. Yesterday's cycle: shampoo, rinse, shampoo, rinse, shampoo, wait, what the hell am I doing?
I mailed off my bar exam application/character and fitness questionnaire yesterday. Somewhat anti-climactic considering that as I was walking home flipping through the copy I made for myself...I realized I did something very wrong. Today, I will have to call the VA Bd. of Bar Examiners, then likely have to send a notarized update/correction.
Yesterday, my roomie approached me with "hey, I don't mean to bother you while you are on the phone"...to which I replied "oh, I'm not on the phone. I'm just having very loud conversations with myself." And I was.
I get really annoyed when I get to the bottom of a box of cereal and there is not enough for a bowl...yet too much to just throw away. This has happened a few times lately. To remedy the situation (and so as not to waste) I just indulged in a bowl of Honey Nut Chex/Special K Strawberry/Shredded Mini-Wheats. Yum.
UPDATE: If you make yourself a fresh cup of coffee at 10:30 on a Saturday night, then settle back into the same seat you have been for seven days...you should make sure to first remove the other coffee mugs that have accumulated in your sacred work space...lest you accidentally get a really nasty jolt of cold ?-day-old coffee.
Sunday, April 15, 2007
New. Favorite. Reader.
I have a paper due Tuesday that is currently sucking the life (not to mention creativity) right out of me! That means I have nothing interesting to say that does not pertain to how Syria was able to make reforms in their laws of personal status despite the alleged closing of the gates of ijtihad. Yeah, I figured you didn't want to hear about that. Instead, I will pass on what I believe to be one of the greatest pieces of writing ever that I received via email today.(this comes from my new favorite WonL reader):
Hi Law-rah. I am currently in London for the week for work and wondered if there was anyone you might like me to pay a visit and send your greetings as in the way Michael Corleone said hello to people. Just wondering. Your wish, dear madam, is, as always, my command.
Yeah, that is just fabulous.