The random thoughts of an architect-turned- lawyer from the deep south living in Washington, DC...

Monday, October 24, 2005

Goodbye my Angel

I moved to Washington DC in July of 2001 with no clue what to expect. I was a southern girl with a so-so educational background and very little life experience BUT huge dreams of a great future that I was not willing to let go of. At the same time, I was in a new city all alone in a new job and terrified. Most people who know me are shocked to learn that I spent my first three months miserable. "No way, Laura, you can make friends with a brick wall." For whatever reason and a variety of circumstances, I had a really hard time adjusting. Every day I woke up and put on a fake smile for work. Every night, I went home and drank a bottle of wine (alone) and smoked a pack of cigarettes on my balcony. I would usually call friends back home. I cried every night. So many times I just wanted to go back to Louisiana. No one here seemed to notice me or care about me. I really thought I had made a mistake moving here.

When I started my first job here, I had no idea what to expect. I met a lot of people but most of them were not really very outgoing. I ate lunch alone on my first day of work. My first week at the office, I don't think I made a single friend. I overheard multiple conversations about "Steph" and "oh, you are right, Laura is just like Steph" but she was out of the office, so I had not yet met her. When Steph returned, she was the cutest, bubbliest, most outgoing girl I had met. She immediately took me under her wing inviting me out with her friends and bringing me into her world. God could not have sent me a more endearing angel. Over the next few months, Steph could feel when I was down and knew when to call me. (She also invited me to eat lunch with her;-) I left that firm after a few short months, joined another firm, began to make lots of friends, and things started to look up.

Steph and I have kept in touch for years now, doing dinners, birthdays, sausage po-boy nights, scrapbooks, Freddie Prinze Jr. movies and just good girl times. We have one of those friendships that I find so intriguing. (You know, the "pick up where we left off" kind.) To this day, I never understood how people thought I was like Steph. I could only dream of being such an amazing woman. She is strong in her Faith and her convictions. She is beautiful (even with no make-up on the elevator) and she does not even realize it. She has a contagious laugh. She understands how powerful a hug can be at a crucial moment. She is just so genuine...so strong in places in her life that I am so weak. I have looked up to her for four years now and I know that I will continue to look up to her when she moves.

Steph Bobb, my dear friend, I hope you know how much you have meant to me in my life. I hope you know how much I admire you and I hope you know that YOU are what got me through a few of the roughest times in my life. I pray that you have an angel or two in North Carolina to take you in and make you feel as loved as you made me feel. D.C. will be a little less cheery without you!

Small-town DC,
Ironic, at 7am…
The street lights
Casting eery shadows
Of early-morning preparations
In the dusk.

A deli-shop chain
Feels like mom & pop,
Bustling about with a friendly smile,
Delivery trucks,
And folk music.

The metro--
Quiet this morning…
The darkness
of a sleepy day
Not yet awake.

Not rushing;
Not “walking left”
Up the long escalator.

So much more to consider
Even time itself…
Not the frustration with
Slow passers,
Incompetent walkers.

Life isn’t about me.
It never was
Never will be.
And I know this.

PS. This is the first in a series of good-byes to my all my dear friends who have recently decided to pursue dreams outside of this city. Samer, so help me God, if you even think about leaving...I'll have to start smoking again to get through this!