WonL

My Decade

2009-12-31T09:11:00.004-05:00

Not surprisingly with the New Year approaching, I have been in a reflecting mood these past few days. Seems that this year, I've reflected not only on the past year, but on the past decade. WOW. We are wrapping up the first decade of this century. WOW.

I feel like I have accomplished, experience, and lived through a lot these past ten years. I took some time yesterday to capture my reflections with a pen and paper. I made a list of the top ten most monumental moments of my past ten years. It was actually tougher than I thought - especially trying to decide what to include and what not to include. It really puts into perspective the events over the past ten years that have molded me.

Got a Bachelor's of Architecture degree (May 2001)
Left home and moved to Washington, DC (July 9, 2001)
Endured September 11 living in our nation's capital (September 11, 2001)
Quit Smoking (June 9, 2004)
Graduated from law school (May 2007)
Took and passed the Virginia Bar Exam (July and October 2007)
Traveled around the world (August-September 2007)
Watched the economy take down my law firm leaving 675 people jobless (November 28, 2008)
Had surgery on my spine (June 4, 2009)
Blogged my life (August 23, 2004 - December 31, 2009)

I am sure that last one comes as no surprise (especially considering I have not posted in 6 months). Still, I feel a twinge of sadness calling it a day over here. This outlet endured longer than anything these past ten years and I think a huge part of that is the people I have met and the bonds I have forged.

What began as an online means of whining about law school turned into so much more. I have met some amazing people both in person and on the internet. I have become closer to many people in my life becuase this blog gave me the opportunity to communicate more freely than I ever learned to in my words in person. I have expressed feelings and emotions on this blog that I kept hidden from many in my real world.

I truly hope to find time in my life return to writing again one day. But WonL was for the first decade of this century - a decade that is now coming to a close.

Thank you to everyone who has ever participating in my life through WonL - be it through comments, emails, or even simply reading. I will miss you. Please stay in touch. LawRah04@gmail.com

Dear red tape - enough already!

2009-05-18T14:00:00.004-04:00

My physical therapist told me her goal is to make me as comfortable as possible until the surgery. I am currently going to p.t. for lumbar traction twice a week and she recommended that I get a take-home lumbar traction machine for the other days. After my last appointment, she handed me a piece of paper that had three steps (1) call insurance company; (2) give them this code; and (3) ask them these two questions. How very nice of a medical professional to make this easy on me.

Then comes the insurance.

I called with my code. The guy says he can't find anything. I ask him to try again. He does so with a sigh.

Him: "There it is. Oh, this code is wrong, it's telling me 'miscellaneous.' You need to ask the people who rent the equipment for the code.
Me: "That is where I got the code."
Him: "I don't know where you got that code."
Me: "That's what I'm telling you, the code came from the lumbar traction machine rep."
Him: "That is who you need to speak with - get the code from them."
Me: "Is there another way to look up the piece of equipment?"
Him: "No."
Me: "Really? Not by manufacturer name or description?"
Him: "No."
Me: "I find that hard to believe. You don't have a table of contents or something. I can narrow this down.
Him: "No. I need a correct code."

So I google to try to find the code - call back and get a different person.

Her: "It's not the wrong code, ma'am, it's just a miscellaneous code. Getting a new code will do no good. We need more information before we can determine if we cover it."
Me: "Phew, okay, what do you need?"
Her: "We need a letter of medical necessity from your doctor, a prescription from your doctor, the manufacuter's brochure, photographs of the equipment, a serial number, three price quotes..."
Me: "Oh my God, nevermind. I will just live with the pain."
Her: "Okay, thanks for calling and have a nice day."

I am now convinced that people turn to whacky home remedies not to avoid doctors, but to avoid insurance.

When physical pain leads to emotional turmoil

2009-04-30T10:02:00.011-04:00

This has all happened so gradually that I didn’t really notice it. I have been living with pain for months and was obviously well aware of what it was doing to me physically. But it was not until recently that I comprehended the extent of what the pain was really doing to me. Or at least to the me I used to be.

When this all started over 8 months ago with a shooting pain down my left leg, I stopped for a moment. I took a deep breath, grasped a chair and waited for it to pass. And it did pass. "Oh, I'm fine," I recall myself saying. I went about my day not giving it a second thought.

I began getting these shooting pains a little more often - once or twice a day. I started to be more cognizant of how I was sitting and tried to avoid lifting anything heavy. If the pain came while someone was around and they took note of my wincing face, I would simply explain "I think there's something wrong with my back messing with my sciatic nerve. I'll be fine." I can handle this.

Over time, the pain became more frequent and much more intense. It no longer came just when I stood in a certain position. I was getting sharp pains when I changed positions from standing to sitting, from sitting to standing, from laying to sitting, etc. (you know all those functions you do all day). The pain was shooting down both legs now instead of just one. It was coming every day, multiple times a day. To make matters worse, it was waking me up at night. None of the doctor-prescribed muscle relaxers, anti-inflammatory pills or pain pills was working. This all came at the height of major career stress (my law firm dissolving, losing my job, getting another job, etc.) I figured once the stress subsided, the pain would become manageable as well. The pain wasn’t drastically life-altering, right? I just needed to slow down a bit. I quit going to the gym; I began to recognize situations that increased the pain (long periods of walking or standing) and avoided them; I began spending some of my down time at home resting instead of out on the town. I can figure this out.

"You have an extraordinarily high tolerance for pain," said my new orthopedic surgeon when he looked at my MRI. 'Large central herniation' was the official diagnosis. (Although the report indicated a slew of other issues and used words like degenerative, narrowing, bulging, etc.) Okay, but how do we fix this so I can get back to normal? Since back pain seems to be one of life's great mysteries, it follows that fixing back pain is just as difficult. OrthoDoc recommended surgery (he is a surgeon after all) but I nixed that idea quickly. I firmly believed that there are way too many alternatives to surgery that I should turn to first. If it takes time, so be it, but no one is cutting my spine open. I can deal with the pain a little longer.

After my first cortisone epidural, I was in heaven. For the first time in months, my pain was a 5 on a scale of 10. (I live my life on a pain scale these days since it is every doctor’s first question.) Sadly, it didn’t last. Over the next few months, I went in for two more rounds of epidurals with little to no relief. After that, I tried aquatic physical therapy, then regular physical therapy, then just lumbar traction.

During that time, I was lead associate on a really "hot" case at work that demanded 14+ hour days. This was a blessing for me since the pain was really limiting my activities by now. I threw myself into my work and spent day, night and weekend on this case. This was one aspect of my life that the pain would not slow down. I would not let it. The harder and longer I worked, the less opportunity I had to dwell on the pain. The partners would say "take a day off" or "leave the office and get a life." I didn’t think I needed a day off. I didn’t realize it at the time, but this case had become the shield I needed to hide the pain.

The case settled on April 14. It was very soon after that my mind caught up with my body and the emotion of what I have been going through kicked in. My willingness to put in so many extra hours was not just because of some hard work ethic. I worked so much because I didn’t want to face the pain. My alternative to working is not spending a day strolling around the monuments, or going dancing with girlfriends, or taking my dog to the dog park. Those would all be too painful. My alternative to work is to lie on the sofa and drink a bottle of wine. (Which I have done many-a-nights in the past 8 months.)

I also had time now to realize that the physical pain has really taken a toll on my emotions. I am so angry and short tempered. Every little thing pisses me off even when I know it is not worth a second thought. Plus, I cry over stupid stuff. Like the time last week that my secretary asked me how I was feeling. Of course, this is all made worse by my lack of sleep. I realized I don’t even want to be around people because I am such an emotional mess. Who wants to be around such a miserable person?

I am not fine; I cannot figure this out or handle this on my own; I cannot deal with the pain any longer. I realize this now.

A week after the case settled, I went to OrthoDoc to talk surgery. He introduced me to NeuroDoc and we scheduled my spine surgery for June 4. NeuroDoc said "there is a 90% chance you will be pain free after this surgery." I started crying.

"Pain, especially chronic pain, is an emotional condition as well as a physical sensation. It is a complex experience that affects thought, mood, and behavior and can lead to isolation, immobility, and drug dependence." September 2004 issue of the Harvard Mental Health Letter

I popped out of bed.

2009-01-28T19:37:00.003-05:00

For months now, getting out of bed has been one of the more dramatic parts of my day. Despite my top of the line mattress and sleeping on my side with a pillow between my legs (doctor recommended) - I still wake up in pain. The worst part is physically moving my body off the bed. I've tried rolling out of bed, sitting up and scooching to the edge, rotating to put my feet on the floor first. None is any less painful than the other.

It doesn't end with getting myself upright. There's still that whole walking thing to deal with. As I painfully put one foot in front of the other, the dog just watches me. He used to wake up at 6am hyper as can be. Now he just sits there, feeling sorry for me. Not sorry enough to hold it though. Oh no, he has to go out first thing. I painfully throw on sweats then we have our morning "you have to jump up here because I can't bend over to put your leash on" conversation. Eventually, I muster up the strength to hobble around outside and let the dog do his thing.

I spend our whole morning walk thinking "are you serious - I'm 31 years old. Am I really falling apart already?" Then I take an inordinately long shower because the hot water feels good and I don't have to move. Then I grab my coffee and pop 4 ibuprofin hoping they will kick in by the time I get to work.

So begins my day.

Not today. This morning, I popped out of bed, turned off my alarm and just stood there. I realized that I popped out of bed. I painlessly got out of bed. No rotating and scooching and rolling. I just plain got out of bed - I don't even remember how. Such a simple act to radically transform my morning.

I hope this is the beginning of me becoming me again.

Fear

2009-01-27T09:24:00.005-05:00

I am having a cortizone epidural in my spine today and I am scared.

I am not scared of the local anesthetic. I am not scared of the large epidural needle. I am not scared of the fact that they have to move over my sciatic nerve to get to my herniated disc. I am not scared of my decision to forgo sedation for this procedure. I am not scared of the pain of today.

I am scared this will not work. I am scared that even after today I will still not be able to bend over and pick up my dog or clean my bathroom floors. I am scared that after today, sitting, laying down, and standing will still hurt. I am scared that after today I will still have to stop and catch my breath a few times an hour. I am scared that after today, I will still have to live with this dabilitating pain that makes getting through my days so difficult.

A glimpse inside of me

2008-11-14T07:06:00.006-05:00

I've been miserable and whiney for months now. I won't say "depressed" - but definitely miserable. Granted, some may say I've had good reason (see, dissolution of my lawfirm). As if that was not enough, I have also been dealing with this crippling back paid.

I have actually dealt with lower back pain for years. Last diagnosis was a degenerative disc. I have had x-rays, medications and physical therapy. I invested in a tempurpedic mattress, a $1500 ergonomic office chair and I have pages of stretches to do when it acts up.

This recent pain, though, has been different. It's a pain that none of the above could make any better. It is a sharp pain that shoots through my butt and down my legs, sometime bringing me to my knees. In fact, it once flared up while I was in a partner's office talking about a brief we needed to file. I'm sure he thought I was a little "off" when my body doubled over and I had to catch myself on his chair - then followed up with "I'll be fine, it will pass." Nothing has worked to relieve this including muscle relaxers, anti-inflammatory pills, and pills for muscle spasms. (Doctor put me on them all at once. Two weeks ago, there was a day where I had to take 19 pills.)

Most people keep telling me "oh, it's probably stress related" and "you just need a good massage" and "I have lower back pain too, you just have to learn to manage it." I ignore them because this is different - really different

I had an MRI yesterday - which incidentally is a pretty miserable experience itself. The cool part though, is that they sent me home with a CD of the scans of my spine that I am supposed to bring to my doctor. Of course, before I brought it I popped it into my computer. Really cool stuff.

Now, I'm no doctor or expert on reading MRI scans, but I am pretty sure that this is not how my spine is supposed to look:

In case you are having trouble reading, let's compare my spine (with the pain point highlighted) to an image I found on the internets:

Since the stupid MRI does not come color coded, I am having trouble with my self-diagnosis. I am down to "bulging" or "herniated." Either way, I'm thinking this sucks.

Sentimental First Year

2008-09-24T09:00:00.005-04:00

Today marks one year to the day that I began as an associate at my law firm. Time sure does fly. Most of you who know me (or know where I work) are aware, there is some looming uncertainty about the future. I refuse to allow today to be about that. Today is about the fact that I work with an amazing group of people doing things I truly love doing.

My first year has broken all the stereotypes that people warned me of: the first year is always miserable, I will be doing nothing but reviewing documents, Partners treat first years like dirt, etc. Not a single one of those stands true at my firm. (Aside from one or two partner-blips.) I am well aware that not many first years can say that they are truly happy at their firm. I can. Whatever lies ahead, I consider my first year as a lawyer to have been a great one and I am thankful that I have been lucky enough to have the experiences I have had.

Fried

2008-09-09T07:46:00.002-04:00

I am feeling the brain-fried levels of stress I felt during my first ever law school exams. (Like when I made a grilled cheese sandwich but forgot to remove the plastic wrapper.) Yeah.

Yesterday, partner handed me edits on one of the summary judgment motions. I get to a page where there is a long indented quote from another judge in another case. Judge cites multiple cases and legal conclusions that we rely on very heavily. Partner simply writes "justify". In my head (and in the confines of my office), I got pissed. Really? Why the hell do we have to justify this? The damn judge said it word for word. Do I really need to pick it apart and analyze it? I do not have time for this shit today!

Or maybe he meant force justify the font.

Yeah.

Why I have not written...

2008-09-06T08:17:00.003-04:00

I looked at my "To Do" list and realized I was having some trouble prioritizing. It seemed like everyone wanted his/her stuff done immediately. I spent all week watching the pile of assignments grow all the while trying to warn these partners that I was already swamped and beginning to drown. That was falling on deaf ears. My time sheet Wednesday reflected ten matters that I worked on and Thursday's had eight. It is admittedly difficult to make forward progress on any task when you can only give it small snippets of time. It's called spread too thin.

In an effort to prioritize my weekend time, I sent emails to three partners with big deadlines. Granted, I have mutliple other "hot" cases that I am sure will make next week even more hellish - but I will fight that battle when it gets here. Yesterday, I was merely worried about my Saturday and Sunday.

To one partner, I asked what sort of time commitment we are looking at this coming week for our Daubert motion/summary judgment motion (due the 15) . He said we should discuss because he fears it will be "too tight for comfort."

To another partner I asked when he would like to file the summary judgment motion and complaint that we just decided today we would file and that I will be drafting entirely on my own. His response was simply "Monday."

I then headed to third partner's office. While I love working on this case and with these two partners, I also know they are super-time consuming (the case and the partners). I wanted to walk into her office already armed with my schedule in my other pressing cases. When I explained my conversations with other two partners I might have seen tears in her eyes. "Law-Rah, I need you the entire weekend and every day next week. You don't seem to understand, you are THE ASSOCIATE on this case." (This is partner speak for "it is your responsibility to bear the brunt of the work.") I sat there quietly trying to figure out how to tell her that I am "the associate" on all three of the cases without making her feel hers was less important.

Thankfully, one of the other two partners walked in to talk to her about my time. It was a fascinating conversation to watch. "Well, does yours have an external deadline?" "Well, mine is a first amendment case." "Well if we file Monday we are likely to get the whole case thrown out and client will be ecstatic." "Well, I can't get anyone else to help because client is already angry about the bills." "This is very important for her professional development." I just sat there. Fascinating. In the end, it worked out fine but of course I lost a good half hour going through the process.

So here I am, about to head to work for 9am on a Saturday. I should be miserable about this. But I can't help but think that things could be much worse. I could have no partners fighting over my time. I could have no one giving me work. I could be nervous about my job security. I'm not.

That, my friends, is why I have no time to blog. Miss y'all!

Titleless

2008-08-04T21:34:00.004-04:00

Hello? Anyone out there? Can't blame you if you're not. But if you are, well then, hello! I have a lot to say, but not really much to say at all. Instead, I figured I would update/bore you with what is going on over here.

First off, the "Killer Socialization Project 2008" has been overwhelmingly successful. Seriously. My little urban chihuahua is adjusting quite nicely to his new life. Looking at him now and considering just 6 short months ago, he was in Louisiana growling and cowering away from everyone who approached him - I'd say you sure can teach an old dog new tricks. This little guy the friendliest most approachable dog in the building. In fact, just the other day, I caught him climbing on a homeless guy trying to share his food. Shocking, I know, a homeless guy in Clarendon. Anyway, he's doing very well and I love having him here.

Work is great. I really love my job. When I think back to how much I have learned and grown as a lawyer this past year, I sit in awe. And of course, when I think back to how I learned none of it during my $150k debt years (aka: law school), I sit in disgust. Let's see, not much I can divulge about work...but, I brought in my first client! (Not to be confused with client referred to in my last post who was not, in fact, my client but was someone else's client who that someone else seemed to forget was someone else's client.) Anyway, my client is a guy I met through another client who called me up to help him handle a problem with a contractor on his house. I'm pretty excited about that because (1) makes me look good to the higher ups (2) good experience to get to go through the process to see how it's all done and (3) I can seek out mentoring and advice from more seasoned attorneys but I get to call the shots. Yeah, I could get used to this. I just gotta keep my ego in check. A partner asked me to do a non-billable assignment today and my first instinct was to say "um, can you get someone else to do this, I have clients relying on me." Of course, my actual response was "sure, I'd love to."

The running thing is on hold for a bit. I was actually doing pretty well for a while there. Then I got injured. I wish I could say it was a running injury. But alas, it was not. It was a stepping out of the back of a van in heels and a dress after a few drinks injury. Planted my foot and my knee went the other way. Pain! (thankfully, dulled by the open bar at the wedding). Anyway, I go to the doctor tomorrow for some x-rays because things don't seem to be getting better. I will keep you posted. Hell, if things go bad and I end up laid up here, I will have plenty of time to blog!

Let's see, what else is there? I think I am down to just mere tidbits of information:

Um, I am going to see NKOTB in October. I am very excited because New Kids was my first concert ever!

Um, the CVS and Thai food place across the street from me finally shut down. I am super sad about this. I just kinda figured since they were supposed to shut down two years ago and then again a year ago that maybe they never would.

Um, I suck at guitar hero. Really. At least I rocked the Wii Golf. But royally sucked at guitar hero.

Um, I just got an email from American Airlines. They tell me they are ending their relationship with Kayak.com. Well that sure is stupid. They boast of making AA.com your one-stop-shop. The whole point of kayak is that it compiles all the fare information from all the sites. So, AA, by removing yourself from kayak, do you honestly think folks are going to make a special trip to your website? Well then, you must have taken the same Bad Business Decisions class as my firm management folks.

Yeah, way to bring it full circle.

That's all I got for now. What about you?

This lawyer thing is hard

2008-07-25T09:30:00.002-04:00

I had to deal with my first ever unhappy client this week. Not fun. A friend summed it up quite nicely: "gotta love climbing the steep learning curve without a safety net."

Something to read

2008-07-20T18:34:00.003-04:00

Remember this time last year...when I was gearing up for a big trip. Ah, travel, how I miss thee. Anyway, since I am apparently too busy to travel, blog, sleep, etc., I figured I'd introduce my fair readers to friends of mine who are traveling this summer. Both of which are blogging about it too.

Bug is driving the U.S.A. (with some Canada in the mix).

&

Samer is touring the world - and not surprisingly, taking some phenomenal pictures.

Y'all should go check them out!

Second Amendment

2008-06-25T08:52:00.008-04:00

The Supreme Court should be handing down their opinion on the D.C. gun ban case this week. (They didn't do it on Monday which leaves today and tomorrow.) My quick and dirty prediction - an individual right to bear arms with a rational basis review for any restrictions on that right & SCOTUS kicks it back to DC to scrutinize the law.

Rumor on the street is that Scalia is writing the opinion which of course means I will be sporting a fashionable shirt later. Compliments of this gal, I actually own a shirt with this on it:

UPDATE: apparently, the gun case is NOT being handed down today. This is like American Idol with the "and we will tell you who is going home...after the commercial break." UGH.

One liner of the day.

2008-06-23T22:31:00.005-04:00

Me: The judge did what? Are you kidding?
Partner: If you are thinking of jumping out the window, please hold it open because I'm going to join you.

Why I have the best secretary in the world

2008-06-20T08:20:00.002-04:00

Work yesterday was one of those super busy days where at least one person on every assignment in my stack needed something done. I was getting emails from clients and partners all day. The problem is that I spent from 8:30am to 3:30pm at a client site so I was not really available to work on anything else. Of course, with blackberry in hand, I was able to at least delegate the work and and reply to clients. Mostly, I was able to forward things to my secretary and let her handle getting them covered.

That, my friends, is not the real reason my secretary rocks. Last night, when I was back at work cranking away on things I did not get done during the day...my secretary had a bottle of wine sent down to my office from a reception I was too busy to attend. I heart that woman.

Celebrity sighting

2008-06-14T11:00:00.002-04:00

Apparently I'm the first person in over 20 years of his doing this that has asked to wear the coat. Whoda thought?

I'm "outing" myself

2008-06-10T07:25:00.006-04:00

Here goes: I have decided to become a runner.

Yep, I had one of those "I've found something I want to accomplish, I'm up for the challenge, and come hell or high water, I will get this done!" moments. And in that moment, I decided that I want to become a runner. Truth be told, the moment was over two weeks ago. It has just taken me this long to (a) get on track with this, (b) decide to out myself to others, and (c) sit down and write.

You might ask why, after such a blogging hiatus, I come back with this - something that an average person may think is just be no big deal. Well, dear readers (the few remaining), this is actually quite a big deal for me for a few reasons. First off, I don't run. I have never run. In fact, I have always hated running. I can still recall the days of middle school softball practice when coach would make us run around the field and every time he looked away, I'd start walking. Oh yeah, I showed him.

Another reason for "outing" myself is that I need to do it this way. I need to "put it out there" for others to see. In a somewhat nonsensical way, that will make me keep it up. Much like the melodramatic fashion in which I threw that empty pack of cigarettes down on the table and told everyone around: "I'm done! I will never smoke again," I am now telling everyone "I have decided to become a runner." (Incidentally, yesterday marked five years to the day that I threw that empty pack down:-) Anyway, if I were to just mumble "eh, I think I'll try running" then the first roadblock may very well result in giving up with a "yeah, that sucked, perhaps I'll try knitting." On the other hand, if I tell people, then it becomes real. (nod to Bug) Then, not only do I have a support system but I have people I gotta be accountable to and such. And yes, I know this is not the way I should think about accomplishments, but it has worked for me so far in life. (And yes, mom, I can see you rolling your eyes from here.)

Anyway, I'm on week 3 now and am actually still into this. Granted, I am nowhere near being an actual runner yet, but I have two fantastic running sponsors who will help me get there. This lady sent me a great link to a training program called "couch to 5k" which will be a big help for a non-runner like myself. Last night, I had dinner with my other running sponsor to talk running (among other things). She reminisced with me about her earlier days of running, which was what I needed to hear.

I should also give a nod to my LSBFF (law school best friend forever) who doesn't know this, but she is the reason for my latest endeavor. I have watched what running has done for her in this last year and she has inspired me. Plus, when she came in town a few weeks ago and would go running with another friend of ours and I would sit on my sofa cuddled up with Killer...I felt pretty lazy and left out.

So there it is folks, I have decided to become a runner.

Went to fill my car up this morning

2008-06-09T09:01:00.002-04:00

Decided it would be a better financial move to wait until my next paycheck.

Celebrating my heritage

2008-05-04T22:41:00.004-04:00

Hope you have a Killer Cinco de Mayo my friends.

Welcome D.C. Sports Chicklet!

2008-04-17T22:54:00.008-04:00

Our very own little bitty D.C. Sports Chicklet arrived this evening, three weeks ahead of schedule. No surprise that this little one would pop out early considering the Caps are in the midst of some important games. Anyway, mom and dad are doing well (although truth be told mom sounded a little out of it when I talked to her;-) Look at Kalina Grace:

What a gorgeous little gal. I just can't wait dress her in all pink bows and frills to drive her daddy crazy.

Quick updates

2008-04-17T07:15:00.003-04:00

Sorry for not keeping you loyal readers posted on my daily goings on. I realize this three-week blog down time is unacceptable but I'm going to need some extra time in my day to keep up over here. I have gotten a few emails asking how things are going so here are some quick updates...

Killer is doing just great. Surprisingly great. I had every intention of opening up and writing a long post about my unbreakable bond with this dog. I held off because I'm not sure how to present the story without hurting the feelings of some people I care about. I got a very nice letter last week from my mom talking about how she has been praying for Killer to find a good home for years and she realizes this is the answer. I can't explain how, but I always knew he'd be better off with me. Get a couple of drinks in me and I will likely sob to you about my Killer bond. But for now, I decided the story is not for blog-public consumption. He's doing great. I'm doing great with him here.

Next up: work. Guess what? I can't really talk about it. I will say that there are some changes a brewin' in my office. Changes that I, personally, feel (read: hope) will be beneficial to me and my career. However, there is just as great a chance they will be detrimental. So for now, I am just waiting out the storm with a 'make lemons out of lemonade' attitude.

So, about the car-buying. I test drove the Civic hybrid, Camry hybrid and Prius. It was surely down to the latter two but was a really tough call. Then, I made the adult decision (after consulting with my dad) to get my current gas guzzler fixed instead of buying a new car at this point. Although it was difficult to sink another $500 into a car only worth $1,000...I think it's worth the peace of mind to keep my savings in case the above referenced work (and economy) situation do not play out how I hope.

When I heard about the Delta/Northwest merger I had to laugh. 'Specially considering the 2.5 page letter I wrote to Delta had a line or two about them subcontracting me out to an inferior airline (Northwest). Shockingly, they did not seek out my opinion prior to the merger. No sweat off my back since I have already written both of them off.

This girl has been smoke free for 3.5 months. I have deemed myself her 'sponsor.' I wanted to publicly put her on a pedestal for what she is doing. I look back to when I quit almost four years ago and recall that it was one of the most difficult thing I ever went through. I applaud her and so should y'all.

I absolutely adore my apartment. I am excited for warmer weather to arrive here in DC so I can take advantage of my balcony and the garden terrace.

That's all that is going on with me. What about you?

Simply Amazing

2008-03-31T09:35:00.005-04:00

Welcome Home.

Red carpeted arrival

Red White & Blue balloon arches

Jazz bands

Sold out stadium

Ben's Chili Bowl halfsmokes

Curly "W" pretzels

Beer in souvenier Nats cups

Enormous American flags

F-16 flyover

Presidential first pitch

Baseball-shaped Washington Post stands

Teddy getting lost during the President's race

Helmet sundaes (albeit the wrong teams)

Snuggling under a blanket

Game-winning homerun in the bottom of the 9th !!!

Welcome Home.

Help! Need help car shopping

2008-03-28T08:00:00.005-04:00

As an American, in an attempt to boost our economy, I have decided to purchase a new car. This is a pretty big decision that mostly came about because my 10-year-old Ford Explorer is telling me that he's done. And by "telling", I mean, squeaking and grinding and refusing to allow me to unlock his doors. With a bit of a tax refund coming in that can double as a down payment, I figured I would venture out to purchase my first ever new car.

I have no idea what I am doing and could use some guidance. I thought step #1 would be to walk into a dealership and be completely frank about how many other cars I would be looking at and that I will not be purchasing a car this weekend. That will hopefully get rid of some of the car-salesmany type behavior. If it doesn't, I will fight fire with fire and use some of my stellar negotiating skills. A dear friend suggested I also make clear to them that if they run a credit check on me without my consent, they lose my business. If I hit multiple dealerships this weekend and they all run checks, my credit is going to take the hit.

It dawned on me that I cannot proceed to the car dealerships until I narrow down the vehicles I am interested in. That's where you guys come in! I would love any suggestions, cars you have and like, or don't like, things I should be aware of when shopping, etc.

A few hints about what I think I am looking for: I want a hybrid for environmental, tax, and mpg reasons. Although I adore having an SUV, I'm not sure I'm willing to spend the amounts necessary on hybrid SUVs (at least not now). That being said, I will likely go with a sedan. Also, I don't really like bubbly cars. While I do appreciate the suggestion, Bug, but there is no way in hell I would be caught dead in this. I am not too keen on cars that sit really low to the ground. My last car was a Saturn and it was just too low. Other than that, I'm pretty open because I'm not sure what I should be looking for.

Help!

Satellite terminals, hail storms and terrorist dogs...

2008-03-17T16:51:00.012-04:00

...otherwise known as my weekend.

Prelude: I spent quite a bit of time and money preparing for this weekend's trip. The sole purpose: to pick up Killer from Louisiana. In January, I booked a flight where I could have him in the cabin with me. I had my travel agent follow up twice with Delta to confirm all the details. The game plan was to fly out first thing Saturday morning. My parents and Killer would pick me up from the airport, we'd head home to boil crawfish and just enjoy our time on a warm Louisiana day. On Sunday, I'd pop Killer one of the pills that the vet gave us to sedate him, put him in his newly purchased soft-sided kennel and we'd head to the airport so my little guy could move to his new home. I had every little detail planned out to a T.

Of course, after planning my weekend so perfectly, it's inevitable something would go wrong. I never expected EVERY SINGLE THING to go wrong. Seriously, as I write this I am amazed I was able to get through this weekend without completely losing my shit. I just kept trying to focus on that "when life hands you lemons make lemonade" attitude.

I made it to DCA Saturday morning just in time for my 6:59am flight. I went to check in at Delta because it was a Delta flight and all. Well, since that particular Delta flight was being run by Northwest, I couldn't check in at Delta. In fact, I couldn't check in in terminal B at all. I trekked the mile or so to terminal A. Okay, maybe not a mile, but for those of you unfamiliar with DCA, it is the satellite terminal not really near the main airport. The less-than-nice woman at the Northwest counter says "psh, darling, you are too late. We already quit taking luggage for that flight." She rebooks me on an 11:30 flight on standby then tells me when I get to Memphis I will need to see if they can get me on another standby flight to possibly maybe hopefully get me to Baton Rouge. She ends the conversation by reminding me for the third time that she cannot assure me that I will get to Baton Rouge at all on Saturday.

I head back to Delta in terminal B to see if they can do anything (considering I did book my ticket through them an all). The dumbass behind the counter tells me they have nothing available all day. Then he realizes they have one seat on one flight available for $1190.00. I say no thanks, and decide that considering the mood I was in, it may be better to head home and enjoy a beautiful spring day instead of spending my Saturday sulking at DCA. (Besides, my cell phone was dead and I forgot the charger). I was really uneasy about this "standby all day, maybe possibly going to get to Baton Rouge" business. Logging on to delta.com, I was immediately able to find multiple available seats/flights on Saturday. I booked one at an exceptionally high price (yet nowhere near $1200) and figured I would write Delta a letter to get some vouchers out of it. I also called Northwest to find my bag that the woman checked when she "rebooked" me. Imagine my surprise to find that not only had my luggage already made it to Baton Rouge, but it made it on my 6:59am flight...you know, the one I couldn't get on because they weren't taking luggage anymore.

After getting out some of my pissed-off-ness by writing my "Delta, you whored me out to Northwest, you owe me" letter, my zen-ness kicked in and I was able to enjoy my day. Lemonade out of lemons, right? I re-vamped some of my detailed planning including getting my dad to postpone boiling the crawfish.

I made it to DCA (for the second time Saturday) in plenty of time for my 4 o'clock flight. My 4 o'clock flight that was going through to Atlanta. My 4 o'clock that did not leave D.C. until 7 o'clock because the Atlanta airport was shut down for a few hours because a hail storm hit. By now, my parents had pretty much given up on me and boiled the crawfish. I imagined what a great time they were having as I sat on a runway in an airplane that ran out of bottled water. I got to Atlanta at 8:15 and my connecting flight had been pushed back to 9:15 (perfect!). By 9:15, they meant 9:21, no 9:34, no 9:53, no 10:06. I quit paying attention to the board overhead. I eventually got on a plane.

Upon finally arriving at the Baton Rouge airport, the Northwest people with my luggage were nowhere to be found. I rang the buzzer, went behind the counter to knock on the door, called NW from their little red phone and even had the Delta folks page them. All I could say at that point was that Northwest was completely worthless. My mom had clothes I could wear and unopened toothbrushes, so I decided I would just pick up my luggage in the morning...you know, when I leave to head back to DC. Getting a little tired of making lemonade out of lemons at this point. But, at least I'm in Baton Rouge.

We implemented our plan on Sunday to get Killer to the airport, quickly finding out that Killer did not like our plan. He freaked out pretty much the entire way to the airport. And at check in. And once we got in the terminal. The pills did nothing at all except glass-over his eyes. Did not stop him from barking and squealing. I found a spot in the sun and sat far away from the gate to calm him down. He finally calmed down. Still an occasional whimper, but he seemed to be finished barking. When I stood up to board the plane, he started again, but I figured I could get him calm again once we sat down. Once I was in my seat (and he was on the floor beneath the seat in front of me), he was still doing this whimper/squeal thing. The girl next to me said "I wouldn't worry about it, kids scream on planes all the time." I figured once we took off, he'd be okay. All boarded up, people in their seats, ready to go. Then, it happened.

A short little man came to my seat and asked me to come with him to speak to the captain, who told me I was being kicked off the plane. Some passengers complained about the dog. Are you freaking kidding me? There was a loud ass drunk woman on my flight last night and no one asked her to leave. There's a baby crying on this flight and no one would dare kick that mom off. I was livid. I decided it would be best if I contain my anger considering I was standing at the cockpit door with the people waiting to "escort" me off the plane. The stupid ass captain tries to explain it as being like if people are allergic to peanuts and they therefore cannot allow peanuts on the plane. I asked if someone was allergic to dogs. No. Then I fail to see how this is similar. He keeps apologizing and saying that "the people on this plane paid for their seats too." HA! I assure you I paid more than everyone. I have now dropped over a grand on flights for myself and my dog this weekend. I have no pity for the financial status of other whinyass passengers. Nevertheless, I also have no say in the matter, so I will go with the short man and get off your plane. Screw lemonade at this point. If anyone gave me lemons, I could squeeze them in a glass and add vodka.

I spend the next 20 minutes at the gate while they try to find me another flight. I tell Killer to bark as much and as loudly as he wants. I also told the short guy that I will demand they remove any screaming children from my next flight. I was not kidding. He says "I have some bad news, your luggage was on that flight." I laughed. The only time I had seen my luggage was when I arrived at the airport, picked it up from Northwest and walked it to Delta. You really think not having my luggage is the bad news in all this? You're an idiot.

I know it's too late for a long story to be short...but I arrived back in DC with Killer (beneath the plane with the luggage) today around 11am. This was not without a lot more barking, some more pills from the doctor, hours of stress, and even a moment in the Atlanta airport with me on my knees crying. I have not worn makeup in two days and have been in the same clothes since Saturday. The course of events that made up my weekend was beyond absurd.

But it's over. I took off work today to recover and we spent our day together. He picked out his favorite spot in my apartment.

Then I took him to PetSmart to get him some goodies and I even let him pick out his own bed. Now finally finally finally, my little guy is home.

Just when things were settling down...

2008-03-13T21:50:00.011-04:00

My life is about to get turned upside down. But in a good way. My favorite little guy in the whole world is coming live with me. Starting Sunday, I will be sharing my apartment with a chihuahua named Killer. I'm nervous about the transition, but I am so excited that I finally get him. Killer has been living with my parents for years and I always wanted him to come live with me. Now I'm ready.

His potty area is set up.

His crate is lined with the softest blanket I have (notice the welcoming committee).

I am even donating my favorite chair and my favorite childhood blanket to make him comfortable.

All that's left is to go get the little guy from Louisiana.

I cannot wait for y'all to meet him (virtually or otherwise)!

Karma's got my back

2008-02-04T22:05:00.000-05:00

I am sometimes amazed at the level of jackassedness I encounter on my morning metro ride. I got onto the metro during rush hour and luckily there were a few seats. Of course, there were also a few folks that obviously never got the metro-etiquitte memo. Seriously dude, I don't care about your cleaning of the mold off the baseboards in your bathroom over the weekend. Judging by the look on your friend's face, he didn't care either.

Where was I? Oh yeah, I find a seat and decide to take it. It's an empty seat on the inside that is blocked by a bitchy looking woman in the aisle seat. I approach her. She looks up at me, obviously unwilling to budge. I raise my eyebrows and point to the seat as if to ask, with merely the look on my face, "why are you blocking a seat during rush hour?" She seems unfazed. She moves her right knee 1/2" as if to signify to me "you can have the seat, but I ain't moving." I fumble my way into the seat "accidentally" turning just in time to hit her with my bag. Oops.

As I pretend to read the paper, I ponder my increasing annoyance with this woman. What to do? I mean, I could dramatically turn the pages of the Express and hit her, but that won't do any good because then she goes off thinking that I am the rude one. I could sigh or huff and puff, but again, I end up looking like the jackass. Maybe I should just tell her something. Not in a rude way...polite rather. I should politely let her know that she is not following proper metro-etiquitte. Yes, for metro riders everywhere, I need to take a stand and let her know that her aisle-seat-hogging is unacceptable during rush hour.

At that moment, I notice her head jerk to the side. I look over to find karma. He is in the form of a kid in the aisle facing the other direction with an extremely large backpack that is positioned mere inches from her face. For the next four stops, every time this kid moved, outer-seat-hog had to duck and dodge his books until she finally got nailed in the face and asked him to move. For the next four stops, I giggled. It took everything in me not to point out that she was the one who so boldly laid claim to the aisle seat. I doubt she learned anything from getting hit by karma but it sure did make me feel good.

Ch-ch-changes

2008-01-31T21:16:00.000-05:00

I'm not ignoring you. I just don't know what to say. I used to have a blog that people read. I used to have interesting things to say (at least I think so). I used to have an anonymity that I could hide behind allowing me to express myself openly through writing. I used to have bonds with my readers that kept me coming back to write and kept them coming back to read. I miss it but I don't know how to get it back.

I have a lot going on in my life. At the same time, there is not much going on in my life at all.

I go to work every day. Well, "mostly" every day. Did I mention I love my job? I can't really talk much about what I do on a daily basis because of that whole attorney client privilege stuff. But really, I love my job.

I've also been undergoing some friendship renovations. I found that transitioning from a law school life of Thursday drunk-fests and dramatic law school proms to a life of work receptions and networking events has led to changes in my social networks. Of course, this is compounded by the fact that some of the changes come from distance or just plain growing apart. It happens, right? Yeah, it happens. Still, it doesn't mean it's an easy transition. I miss certain people. I miss the way it was. At the same time, I'm ready to move on.

I'm also making some changes to my general lifestyle. No, I'm not into chicks now. I'm just adopting a dog. He's a nine year old chihuahua named Killer. I have a bond with this dog that would take another bottle of wine and a free evening to explain. One day, my friends, one day. It's going to be a difficult transtion (to say the least) considering my new apartment is on the 11th floor penthouse and he's not potty trained. Details, details. He's coming live with me and I'm ecstatic.

Otherwise, I cannot think of what to write about that has been going on in my life. Um, I got stuck on a stalled metro for 40 minutes then fell while running up a down escalator last week. Got lots of bruises and really messed up my hand. Um, I got pulled over in the Pentagon parking lot by some schmuck that had too much time on his hands (30 minutes he took) and felt the need to issue me a written warning for making an illegal u-turn...in a damn parking lot. Um, my mom came in town with a gift in tow that she excitedly handed over to me not realizing I had actually given it to her for Christmas this year. Um, this writer's strike is really starting to piss me off.

So, bottle of wine complete...I really can't think of much else to say. I miss you guys and truly hope to get back to this soon.

New little guy

2008-01-14T19:21:00.001-05:00

Best...letter...ever!

Washington Post unfair?

2008-01-03T10:25:00.000-05:00

Last night as I was switching lines over at Metro Center, I noticed bunches of WMATA workers posting up signs like this:

My first thought was "oh come on! everyone has to protest something in this damn town." Then I wondered if I had missed the declaration of war between WMATA and the Washington Post? As I watched them hang these enormous posters and banners, I wondered who was footing the bill for these huge very nicely designed posters. I also wondered what was so unfair about the Post. Then, my train came and I went about my evening not giving a second thought to any of it.

Stepping off the train at Metro Center this morning, I realized those WMATA workers had a busy night. The station is covered in this new creative ad campaign aimed at the Post. Walking through the station to exit gave me just enough time to peruse all the ads. When I got to work, I logged onto this "unfair" website to see what this is all about. Quite an interesting story there.

Rarely does an ad campaign catch my attention enough to actually notice and follow up. Well done!

It's been quite a year

2007-12-31T11:25:00.001-05:00

In a phone conversation last night, a friend said "wow, you have really had a horrible year." I thought woah, wait, huh, no...I've had a great year. I guess things lately have been less than rosey and that has tainted what was arguably one of the best years of my life. To turn that attitude around, I decided to look back on what I did in 2007...

I got over the worst heartbreak of my life.

I took a last-minute girl trip to L.A.

I went through a family scare and the sadness of the VA Tech shootings.

I finished law school.

I spent a week at the beach with good law school friends.

I attempted to quit blogging (lasted a week).

After an emotional day and a heartfelt blogpost, I was contacted by the family of a deceased Marine.

I entered a new decade of my life.

I took the Virginia Bar Exam.

I ventured off to travel around the world in six weeks.

I began a new career at a job that I love.

I found out that I passed the Virginia Bar Exam.

I got through some health issues.

And of course I had experiences and friendships that were in my life and my heart but never made it onto WonL (as it should be). Tomorrow is really 2008. Not sure what next year will bring, but I sure am looking forward to it.

I hope each and every one of my friends and readers is able to look back on your own year with the realization and appreciation that your experiences are a part of you. Cheers to the memories, both good and bad, of 2007 and those yet to come in 2008. See you next year!!!

Holiday reflections

2007-12-25T20:36:00.001-05:00

Five days at Disney with the family...very different as an adult...disappointed by an old friend...so much love for my nieces...Ann Marie is me...Jessie cuddles up on my chest...family interactions give me insight into myself...

Return home to work...wow, DC is home now...I love my job...send holiday cards to my business contacts...sing in the hallways...they appreciate my spirit...gifts for my secretary...she will get through this...I love my job...

Lawyerly wine-tasting Friday...bonding with co-workers...trip to Cowgirl Creamery...happy hour with school buddies...thoughts wander in directions I don't want...just walk away...safer...

LS-BFF weekend...time to re-charge...you complete me...mucho sangria and a shark of a waiter...nix depressing conversation...new favorite bar...I'm fun in a sassy hat...smooched by a secret serviceman...

Ice skating in the city...lunch at the museum...truly enjoying the company...Viking football with a good buddy...realize how much I miss my friends...holiday baking...the southern gal that can't master pralines...

Christmas Eve dinner with the Italian family...presents and homemade Lemoncello...they make me Santa...the whole family together...late night movie...sofa-cuddling with the cousins...

Wake up Christmas day to work...so sick of the Second Amendment...holiday baking and wine with a good friend...amazing how connections are made...reflecting on scary life changes...how hard are you willing to fight?...walk away but always look back...only one single Merry Christmas call from back home...out of sight out of mind I guess...I don't even realize it...what used to hurt doesn't hurt anymore...

Good friends...time with myself...pushing away thoughts of last year...no regrets...better off now...lucky to have the ability to pick and chose people in my life...so many great people around...reflect at the end of the day...Christmas 2007 was all I could have wished for and then some.

Hope yours was wonderful!

We love our football!

2007-12-21T15:28:00.000-05:00

This is priceless!

I, personally, am working on a super-important brief due the following day. Perhaps I should notify my team that I will be unavailable the evening before.

I am alive

2007-12-16T12:40:00.000-05:00

Sorry for the absence guys, I went on a pre-Christmas vacation and completely forgot to update the health status before my departure.

I am still battling this post-op infection. For those keeping track, we are at 3.5 weeks now. Still on antibiotics, still have a scar-tissue-infection bump on my jaw, bump is still pressing on the nerve which means I still have no feeling in my bottom lip or chin. Good times. On the flip-side, I am eating normal foods and I am able to consume alcohol again so I guess life is getting somewhat back to normal.

Next up...A trip to Disneyworld from the eyes of an adult!

Misery

2007-11-29T09:50:00.000-05:00

I can admit when I am wrong. (I can also find ways to shift blame...stupid doctor!) So, my brilliant plan to schedule oral surgery right before Thanksgiving to avoid missing work...well, that fell through. In fact, today is Thursday (one week and one day since surgery) and not only did I miss Thanksgiving, but I still have not returned to work. I am beginning to get a grasp on a misery I have never known before.

Believe it or not, I actually have a high tolerance for pain. Due to multiple ear surgeries, I get to go to a doctor every six months for the rest of my life for him to pull the skin out of my ear. (Imagine someone pulling a scab off of your eardrum.) Yeah, I am honestly accustomed to pain. But this week, my friends, I have felt pain like I have never felt before. The throbbing and the sore and the sheer pain.

The wisdom teeth removal part was not that bad. It's the post-op infection that has brought me to my knees.

I have a huge mound-o-infection on the side of my face. I am on my second refill of vicodin (which is a lot considering I am anti-pain medication). I still cannot chew real food. It hurts to talk (which, for those of you that know me, realize it is extremely difficult to fathom me silent). I cannot sleep for more than a few hours at a time and when I do sleep it has to be sitting up. I have watched well over 50 episodes of CSI: Crime Scene Investigation and I am going absolutely stir-crazy in this apartment. The worst part is that I can't even catch up on round-the-house sort of things like folding clothes or decorating for Christmas. Nope, the pain becomes too much after about 30 minutes of being off the sofa.

I have learned quite a bit thus far in my 192 hours on my sofa:

-the saying "misery loves company" is bullshit. Ask my roommate. I am not a fun person to be around right now and I prefer to stew alone;

-although I am not a huge ordered pizza fan, the Pizza Hut stuffed crust pizza commercials have become pure torture to watch;

-CSI comes on four different stations and there is a "marathon" at least once a day;

-when clothes test positive for GSR (gun shot residue), they show up blue in the lab test;

-I am not programmed to sit around;

-I have a great job and I miss being there;

-there is difficulty in taking pain medication that you must take on a full stomach when you can only eat jello, ice cream and mashed potatoes;

-when you tell the doctor that you are an attorney they take you more seriously;

-when the doctor sends you home with a plastic syringe to stick in the wisdom-toothless hole twice a day to clean it out...it's actually not as bad as it sounds.

Wow, what a whiny rant of a blogpost. Blame it on the pain.

No Turkey for you!

2007-11-20T08:20:00.000-05:00

Actually, no turkey for me.

I'm getting my wisdom teeth pulled tomorrow. The day before Thanksgiving. Before you say "oh, you poor thing" like everyone else, I should tell you that I am looking forward to this.

I will not have to travel on the busiest travel days of the year.

I will not be consuming the 5,000 calories the average American consumes on Turkey day.

I will not be missing any work days...but more importantly, I am unable to work over the break if someone needs me.

All swelling *should* go down by work Monday.

I will have little pills that will help me catch up on the much-needed sleep I have not had in recent weeks.

I have a good friend that will wait on me hand and foot as long as I continually provide him beer.

Personally, I think I could not have scheduled this for a more brilliant time!

Amicus blog for DC gun case*

2007-11-14T07:25:00.000-05:00

(Alternate title - My Two Cents: Added to the Already Overflowing Piggy Bank)

Dear Supreme Court of the United States,

As I am sure you are well aware, especially after your private Friday meeting last week, the Court of Appeals for the DC Circuit struck down D.C.'s handgun ban in Heller (or Parker depending on where you find the case) v. District of Columbia. I have spent weeks now reading and analyzing the situation surrounding this case that has been put before you in a petition for certiorari. I believe I have some insight that may be of value to you.

I have rifled through endless pages that discuss the different views interpreting the Second Amendment (individual rights, collective rights, sophisticated collective/limited individual rights). I have read multiple 36 to 50+ page cases with in-depth Second Amendment analyses (see Parker, Silviera, Emerson) laying out arguments on both sides. I have sought out and documented other Supreme Court precedent that may help shed light on the subject. (I even read Miller 7 times.) I have read the historical text of constitutional debates, conventions and the First and Second congress (well, the House debates since the Senate debates were conducted in secret). I have referred to multiple dictionaries for definitions of words such as "bear", "keep", "arms", "regulated" etc. I have read the work of countless scholars on both sides of the debate (see Tribe, Volokh and Dorf).

But Sirs and Madam, I feel as if today I may have found the source that will really help to clear things up for you. Might I suggest you put aside all other case-law, historical text, textual analyses and even scholarly work. Dearest Justices, you should be reading blog comments to shed light on this alleged 62 years of confusion. For example, you can find multiple helpful views and comments right on the SCOTUS Blog:

Mr. Spencer writes "Remember, had the Second had been written to say: “A well-fed militia being necessary for the security of a free state, the right of the people to store and eat food shall not be infringed,” in no way could that be interpreted to mean that only the National Guard has the right to eat."

Mr. Crim vigorously defends Mr. Heller's position by ending with "Osama bin Ladin is no more than a pirate."

Mr. Donath describes a well-regulated militia as ranging from "the nation needing more troops than a standing army has...to a lone woman stopping a rapist in the parking lot."

I would advise you pay special attention to Mr. Donath's foreshadowing "Should, at the Supreme Court level, anything less than a full “individual” interpretation of the 2nd Amendment be rendered, in light of my above comments, what do you seriously think the reaction of “the people” - who are already armed - will be? Think carefully before answering." and of course, his disclaimer: (I advocate nothing - but hear much.)

Mr. Shaw (whose motto is "an armed community is a polite and respectful community") thinks "the Supreme Court has heretofore contorted the language and intentions of the framers to abandon a result that certain fragments of the Court and special interest found unappealing…" Yeah, what he said!

Mr. Rickers finally clears up the confusion surrounding Miller..."Essentially, the defendant Miller, said, “Hey, the NFA34 is unconstitutional because of the 2nd Amendment.” The judge said, “Yeah, your right. Nevermind.”

Quite frankly, I believe I am most drawn to the openness and honesty found in Mr. Anderson's comment:

"Folks, please forgive an old country boy from Mississippi for butting in. I will not pretend to be as well educated as the majority of you here, nor as verbose as many. I will say this however: Rakur, you scare hell out of me. I can think of a number of nations in the past whose governments infringed on individual’s rights to keep and bear arms. Their militias then proceeded -under the government’s direction- to annihilate large portions of its defenseless population. Our sons and daughters have died and are still dying to protect and free such people. I pray your mindset does not gain in popularity. Shooting and killing one’s own son or daughter who is an unfortunate member of my nation’s “militia” wouldn’t set very well with me. I fear I would hold men such as yourself directly responsible. Good day and Godspeed, gentlemen." (emphasis added).

I do not intend to give the impression I am advocating for one view or another. The above blogger comments, while seeming to slant in the direction of an individual rights interpretation, are a mere sampling of those that were readily available to me this morning prior to departing for work. Other blogs out there contain many more well thought-through arguments from commenters.

I request that you take these views into account when determining not only whether to grant certiorari but also when analyzing the depth of the right guaranteed by the Second Amendment.

Yours Truly,
Law-Rah, Esq.

Inspiring

2007-10-26T07:38:00.000-04:00

I am inspired by people. Not all people, of course, but some people. I like to look around and take note of what I can learn from others. Sometimes I watch strangers and just wonder what it is that they could bring into my life if I knew them. This also helps me to appreciate the amazing people I do have in my life.

I have a good friend who has been a source of inspiration to me since I met her. Aside from being smart and beautiful and all that jazz, she has a lot of qualities I find inspiring. She is hard working and dedicated and most importantly (for this weekend) she is perseverant. You see, my friend is running the Marine Corp Marathon this Sunday. Granted, that in and of itself, is a feat I could not begin to touch. If you have ever been to a marathon or known someone who trained, it's truly an amazing accomplishment.

This is not her first time. Last year, my friend went through hell and high water to get herself into that marathon in the first place. Finishing the marathon would prove even more difficult. A little less than halfway her right leg quit working. If you're keeping track, that means over 13 miles to go. She finished. In pain, limping along. She finished. In her words: "What? I am not bagging this freaking race! Not finishing didn’t even cross my mind. I limped back to the race path."

That, my friends, is inspiring. What is equally as inspiring is that she got over her messed up leg and her feelings of disappointment and trained to run again this year. Yep, this Sunday, my friend will run again. This time, she'll have herself a slew of support along the way. Because every so often, it's nice to take a break from one's extremely busy schedule and take the time to appreciate the inspiration around them.

GOOD LUCK MARCI!!!

Now YOU go over there and wish her good luck! She's too busy to blog these days so I advise you just leave her a comment on her Taiwan post:-)

I also recommend reading her thoughts from the race last year.

Well that's annoying

2007-10-23T07:34:00.000-04:00

I got a 7:30 AM phone call this morning! Normally, this would be a dire emergency in my life. Family, work, friend, etc. It was a lady from the doctor's office about an appointment I had three weeks ago. I got a tad nervous.

Her: "Ms. B, I am calling in reference to your appointment on October 1. I am sorry to inform you that your insurance is expired."

Me: "Yes, I know that. That's why I didn't use it. I paid out of pocket."

Her: "Oh you did? Well, there was a mistake. You should have paid $x but you only paid $y."

Me: "No, that is incorrect as well. I paid with a credit card and after your employee had me sign she told me she realized she was wrong and it was actually three times as much. She re-ran my card so I actually paid twice - adding up to $y."

Her: "Okay, I should go pull your file and look at the bill from that day."

Bye-bye.

At this point, my question is...if you are going to call me at 7:30 in the morning to discuss my bill, don't you think you might have a freaking copy of it in front of you. Maybe even one with the correct information?

Phone rings again. This time I answer obviously annoyed.

Her: "Ms. B. Yeah, I was right, you actually owe $z more money."

Me: "Ma'am, it is 7:30 in the morning and I am trying to get dressed and out of the door for work. Might there be a better time this can be handled?"

Her: "Well, I looked back at your bill."

Me: "You will have to call me later today to handle this. I will bring the paperwork to work with me and deal with it then."

Her: "I just wanted to follow up and let you know I was right."

I envision she probably stuck her tongue out after that last line. Personally, I'm not sure it is a good idea to call anyone (much less a lawyer who is extremely anal-retentive about paperwork) at 7:30am to tell her she's wrong and then brag about being right. Maybe that's just me because she started my day off on the wrong foot for me. Just sayin'

How I found out.

2007-10-18T11:02:00.000-04:00

(Alternative title: Why my attorney photo is going to rock.)

It's 10:35am on October 17, 2007.

I'm sitting at my desk trying to get some work done when an outlook pop up reminds me that my attorney photo will be taken in 15 minutes. I put on some lipstick, check the mirror and hope that my hair is okay.

Before I head upstairs, I decide to check out the VA bar results discussion on JDUnderground. Earlier in the day someone had started a rumor that results would be posted at 10:30 but I was not putting too much stock in all these results rumors anymore. Still, I was enjoying the banter about it. As the page refreshes I notice the last two posts say the results are up. Oh my god. Is this real?

I immediately head to the VBBE results page.

My stomach is somewhere in my throat.

I have stared at and refreshed the same page for a week now and have come to know it very well. As the page loads, I realize it's different. This page has the actual results. My fate is somewhere on this page.

I skip all of the explanation at the top only noticing the word "passed" underlined and bolded.

I start scrolling down.

Shit, I forgot to shut my door.

I'm not getting up now.

I continue to scroll.

My last name starts with a B, why is this taking so damn long?

I refuse to do a Ctrl-F because I could not bear to see the "Finished searching document" if my name is not on there.

Still scrolling.

Re-living all of the dreams I have had in the recent days of this list and my name not being on it.

I am shaking.

I think I can actually hear my own heartbeat.

Shit, I think I forgot how to spell my name.

Still scrolling.

Stop.

There it is.

My name. First, middle, last.

My name is on the list of people who passed the VA Bar Exam.

I blink. It's still there.

Oh my god, I passed the Bar.

I walk away from my computer.

I come back and it's still there. My name is actually really on the list.

I scream and run to the office next door. "Oh my God, I passed the bar!"

I ask co-worker to check the list and make sure my name is on it. She laughs at me.

I run back to my office to do a few searches to find out all of my good friends passed.

I'm still shaking. Now I have tears in my eyes too.

I can't stop giggling and saying "I passed the bar".

I look down to notice that I am late for my attorney photo.

I ran upstairs telling everyone along the way that I passed the bar!

I'm sure the photographer thought I was a fruitcake but at least I will have a huge smile on my face in my attorney photo.

2007-10-17T11:29:00.000-04:00

Pretty soon, if you google my full name, a new website is gonna come up....because I PASSED THE BAR!!!

HUGE thanks for everyone's support.

And HUGE congrats to my girls Schwartz & Arianna for passing!!!

BAR WARS

2007-10-15T17:30:00.001-04:00

While we wait with baited breath, at least we are entertained. This is downright amazing!

Thanks to the Floridian over at JDUnderground for the heads up:-)

Results

2007-10-12T10:47:00.000-04:00

I'm freaking out with the rest of you. Once this 2,539 pound weight is lifted from my shoulders, perhaps I can get it together to post something here. Until then, I will just keep pushing refresh.

Australia (post-Sydney)

2007-09-20T09:32:00.000-04:00

After we left Sydney (with new Camera in tow), we headed north to CAIRNS. Not sure how or why we got it in our head that a trip to Cairns meant beachy time, but there are not actually any beaches there. Well, there was a big man-made lagoon with large metal fish but the nearest beaches were a 30 minute bus ride and they really weren't all that. Cairns itself was sort of this apex starting point for everything amazing to do in northern Australia. This draws in backpackers from all over the world and makes it a uniquely adventurous place to go.

(Sidenote: speaking of adventure, I stayed in my first ever hostel. I have some mixed feelings. I had a great time staying up late and playing poker with the French boys on the porch. On the other hand, I could have used some light or airflow in our room and surely could have done without the constant door slamming all night.)

Back to real adventure: we maximized our adventure in Cairns by doing three one-day tours. The first day we toured the Daintree River and the Rainforests in Cape Tribulation:

"Cape Trib" is the rainforesty area that runs along the coast. You can see why they use the slogan "Where the rainforest meets the reef." The above shot is actually the area where Steve Irwin was diving when he was pierced by the stingray. In our trekking around the rainforest we also went crocodile searching, saw green ants you can lick, cassowarys (which are supposed to be really dangerous), and had lunch at a bar in the middle of the rainforest. We also learned about the disastrous introduction of the cane toad into Australia and attempts to get rid of them using golf clubs and microwaves. (If you don't know the story, go read it, it's truly fascinating.)

Our second day tour was of the Great Barrier Reef. Although the weather could have been better, it didn't really diminish the beauty of the reef. Well, reefs technically. I guess I was expecting one huge reef instead of multiple smaller ones. Stunning nonetheless. We got the best of both worlds. We took a boat out there and spent time in the water getting up close and personal with the inhabitants of the reef:

Then, we took a helicopter back to shore enabling us to take in some of the most breathtaking views ever:

And that was the Great Barrier Reef in a day.

Our last big tour in Cairn's was Uncle Brian's Tour. This was hands down the best tour we took in six weeks. Gus (the bus) and Cousin Kyh took us into the Atherton Tablelands in the interior of Australia to multiple different waterfall sights. Uncle Brian's is a small outfit with only two drivers who rotate days and only one Gus that fits about 20. We sang songs, slid down waterfall rocks, swam in a volcano and went Gus surfing (this is where you stand in the aisle and balance using no hands while Cousin Kyh takes the curves on the mountain rather quickly to try to knock you down.) There really isn't a way to describe the tour that would do it justice. I will say they really had me contemplating scrapping this whole "career" thing and moving to Cairns so I could drive Gus around!

While Cairns itself didn't have too much to offer, the adventures that were right outside of town made that leg of our trip one of the more unforgettable ones.

After Cairns we went to BRISBANE. Since there wasn't quite as much to do or see in Brisbane, it was nice to be able to recuperate after our exhaustion in Cairns. We did spend quite a bit of time at the Lone Pine Koala Sanctuary cuddling the little critters and feeding kangaroos. We also had dinner with my ex-boyfriend and his Aussie girlfriend feasting on Emu, Kangaroo and Wallaby. They also graciously allowed us to use their place to wash clothes, burn CDs of photos and get onto the internet. Plus, they fed us Vegemite and Pavlova. My last day there, I did a tour of the FourX brewery and I also spent time walking around the "beach" in Brisbane. I should note that the (man-made) beach was under construction and those Aussie's used it as an opportunity to show off their sense of humor (note the sign):

All in all, I loved Australia. We spent more time there than in any other country and it was time very well spent. I think that the one thing that stood out about Australia more than anything (besides how funny all the locals are) was how everything and everyone is so outdoorsy and in touch with nature. Spending so much time with the animals, birds, fish, trees, flowers, reefs, rainforests, etc. really did define our Australian experience. After enough time, you begin to realize that each part of nature has it's own personality:

One of the more amazing things I saw on vacation

2007-09-17T10:08:00.001-04:00

About an hour or so of the coast of north Australia...

...after snorkeling over the Great Barrier Reef with Nemo...

...upon returning to the boat...

...the nice bartender man shows me this...

...in a can. Simply amazing.

Home sweet home

2007-09-16T10:38:00.000-04:00

After 44 days with 15 flights to 8 countries, I am back in the U. S. of A. I had the most memorable six weeks of my life but it is really good to be home. I don't start working for a week, so have some time to organize pictures and process my thoughts. For now, I have come to the startling realization that my vacation is almost over.

Bleave me

2007-09-07T13:31:00.000-04:00

Gee, now the keyboard is all in Greek. And I thought Turkey was bad. Actually, Turkey was nice. Quite nice.

Due to "snafu" at the airport (read: we were a day late for our flight out of Dubai), our time in Istanbul was cut short. I had just enough time to meet a nice Turkish boy, have our first date, meet each others friends, have our first fight, have him tell me that he loves me and ask me to marry him. Oh yeah, and I visited Hagia Sophia, the Blue Mosque and the Grand Bazaar. Did I mention we were only in Istanbul for two days. Yeah, those Turkish boys move fast.

Having a blast! Be home in a week and I'm sure I'll have plenty to say. Miss y'all though.

Dubai is heaven

2007-08-28T04:33:00.000-04:00

Honestly, after 4 days in Delhi, I'm pretty sure anywhere would be heaven right now, but Dubai has been good to us so far. We only arrived last night but were quick to notice the stark contrast. I am going to be honest and say that right now, money is surely buying my happiness.

The beef. In India, cows are sacred and roam the streets freely; my first call in Dubai was a midnight call to room service to order a big juicy burger. Mutton was not cutting it for me.

The honking. There are no words to describe the concept of honking in India. It is not viewed as an aggressive rude thing to do. It is just very normal to lay on the horn. Drivers honk to let people know they are behind them, beside them or passing them. They honk to let others know they can pass or cannot pass or they should walk or should not walk. They honk to say hello or goodbye. They honk at bikers, motorcylists, auto-rickshaws, walkers, other cars, camels. They do not honk at cows.

The streets. From what I could learn, Delhi has a population of like 16 million and I think 15 million of them have a means of transportation they use the streets for. Cars, taxis, vans and bikes share the road with cows, camels, goats, pigs and people. There is no method, you just squeeze by. (Note: that doesn't always work, as our car was hit once by someone who didn't notice they just couldn't fit.)

The bacteriad water. For 12 days, I have been brushing my teeth with bottled water and have not had fruit or vegetables or salad. Since arriving in Dubai at midnight last night, we have feasted on lettuce, tomatoes, strawberries, grapes, and most importantly, Diet Coke with ICE.

The shower. Oh how nice it is to take a shower and feel clean. The water in Delhi (and especially in Chiang Mai) smelled so putrid that I felt grosser after bathing. It took us a few days to realize that the overpowering stench from the bathroom was actually the water.

The shopping. We have only ventured two blocks from the hotel so far because we have night safari plans. But we have already spent over an hour in a grocery store and a pharmacy. Just looking around. Clean. Air conditioned. Clean. Products I have heard of. Clean. Produce!

The lack of haggling. The lack of price tags and "bargaining" for everything you purchase was neat at first, but got really old after almost two weeks. It is refreshing to walk into a store and look at an item knowing that I will not have to argue my way out of buying things. And, they have price tags. You find an item, you look at the price, you decide to buy it, you pay that price. What a great concept.

The people and personal space invasions. No one here touches us. No children knocking on our window for money. No salespeople following us for blocks with their products. No taxi drivers doubling the price halfway to our destination. No taxi drivers dropping us off in random places we do not want to go. No one giving me 500 change out of 1000 when the water was 10. No jerks at the airport that charge foreigners (and women) more for the exact same items than they do local men.

The safety. I feel safe to walk around alone here. I didn't even feel safe walking around with two friends in Delhi.

The airports. Honestly, I'm not sure there are words to describe the difference between Indira Ghandi and Dubai International airports.

Really, I think, Dubai may actually be heaven.

Addendum: my traveling companion noted that the post did not seem to convey that we did actually have fun in Delhi. We did. I will surely recap and go into more detail about the highlights of Thailand and India at another time. For now, going shopping!

I am alive

2007-08-22T22:15:00.000-04:00

I am soooo sorry. (Especially to those of you who have emailed concerned about my lack of posting.) I am alive and doing just fine, but sweating buckets. I am typing this from a tiny internet cafe in Chiang Mai. Since everything on the screen (minus my writing) is in odd characters, I have no idea if this will work or not. If you see a new posting and it's in all Thai, you will at least know I am ok. Or perhaps I was sold into whitegirl slavery. Nah, that was only really problematic in Bangkok...Chiang Mai is fine.

Anyway, I have tons to say and pictures to show of my travels so far, but today is my last day in Thailand and I would rather spend it walking around the temples in Old Chiang Mai. Just wanted to tell you all I have not forgotten about you all!!!

G'day from Australia!

2007-08-11T07:25:00.000-04:00

Wow. Sydney. Not sure where to begin. How about night one when my trip was colored a little grey by the theft of my camera. My really nice camera. My camera with pictures of Hawaii and the Sydney Harbour from the airplane. Yep, stolen right off my table at the bar. I guess I deserve some of the credit since I left it unattended on the table when we went on stage to sing "We Are Family" with the Kiwi boys we met. Yeah, smart move. In my defense, we had been warned about boys slipping things in drinks so we spent our evening cautiously watching every movement of every beer purchased for us. I guess watching the rest of my possessions would have been too difficult at that point. Anyway, this is not a post about how the theft of my camera hurled me into a world of sadness and uncomfortable feelings of someone in Sydney having so many pictures of me (and of some of you since I failed to delete all my pictures before the trip.) I got over the camera thing. Eventually.

We spent Monday walking around Sydney concentrating most of our day on the Opera House and Harbour area. We took the ferry over to Manly, a small town north of Sydney known for being tacky and timed our ferry ride back to catch the sunset behind the Harbour Bridge. Absolutely stunning.

On Tuesday, we caught a tour out to Hunter Valley to check out the wineries. That, my friends, has been the best $90 I spent on this trip so far. The 2.5 hour scenic bus ride was quite lovely and gave me some good reading time. Our day included wine tasting at 5 wineries, beer tasting, olive tasting, cheese tasting and chocolate tasting. I'm pretty sure I did not taste a single thing that was not delicious.

On Wednesday, I went for a morning jog around Darling Harbour then grabbed K and we headed back to do some touring around Sydney. I spent time lounging around the gardens of the Sydney Observatory before we ate lunch at The Rocks (where the original prisoners were brought over to Australia many years ago.) After a bit of shopping, we spent the bulk of our day in the Botanical Gardens which, incidentally are enormous! Our intended low key evening of a few drinks and dinner on Darling Harbour took an odd turn. It all started with a local gentleman named Brett who needed a place to sit and drink his beer. Next thing we know, this new travel agent friend of ours has us in a cab on our way to Bondi Beach, an alleged must see outside of Sydney. Yeah, the night just went on from there.

On Thursday, I took on Sydney Solo trying to catch what I could before we left. I spent some time at Paddy's Market which is the D.C. equivalent of Eastern Market only larger and with Asians chasing you around to give you massages. I took the monorail over to Sydney Center and went to the top of the Sydney Tower, just staring out at a truly beautiful city. I was probably most struck by the interaction between the water and the city, an interplay that I only really understood from above. I spent the last of my time in Sydney indulging in some sushi on the Darling Harbour.

"Most Notables" of Sydney (I have to this time - one very general observation and one specific story):

1) I was very intrigued by the similarities and references between Sydney and London: Oxford Street, Hyde Park, Covent Garden, King's Cross, Picadilly. Very interesting.

2) My new camera. I held off for a few days because one of our gentlemen friends from the bar got my email and was going to try to track down my camera for me. Once I heard from him and realized all hope was gone, I decided I needed to move on and purchase a new one. After passing multiple shady looking camera stores, I was getting frustrated with my prospects. I did what I do best...I talked to strangers. I tapped a guy on the shoulder and asked if I were to purchase a camera, where should I go. "You are in luck," he says. "I am on my way to an electronic store to buy a computer." As my luck would have it, not only was this guy's friend really good looking, but he was also a camera expert. In fact, he took us to an electronic store that he works in the camera department in Melbourne. Not only did he find me a great new camera, but he used his staff discount to get me $85 off. Score!

Mahalo Hawai'i

2007-08-06T02:13:00.000-04:00

When K and I arrived in Honolulu, we were actually quite surprised at the lack of stereotypical Hawai'i. No one met us at the airport with leis. No beautiful women were hula dancing. In fact, since we arrived so late on Wednesday, we had dinner at a pizza place as we watched hookers mulling around in front of us. I felt as if I could do that in D.C. Apparently, Waikiki has a bad prostitution problem. Interestingly, in speaking with locals, we found out the hookers are not native, rather they come from Ohio and other mid-western states. I guess if you are going to leave home to become a hooker, Hawai'i is the place to do it.

With a bit of jet-lag setting in, we woke up on Thursday and were on the beach by 8am. Even at that early hour, the place was packed. Fighting through the Japanese tourists, we were able to secure some spots for much needed lounging. The water was so clear that standing neck deep, I could see my toes. And the fish. The fish were everywhere and would swim right up to you as long as you stood still. Pretty awesome.

After a day of tanning and some shopping we adorned ourselves in fresh flower leis and headed to the Paradise Cove Luau. There, we found the "Hawai'i" we were searching for. We were greeted with mai tais and shell necklaces. We made our own bracelets, we watched natives climb trees and pull in the fishing nets, we got Hawai'ian oil tattoos, drank more fruity drinks and watched the ceremonial un-earthing of the pig before sitting down to a Hawai'ian feast. The luau concluded with a Polynesian dance show which can only be described as amazing. The costumes, the dancing, the fire-twirling, the 1/2 nekkid Hawai'ians. Truly amazing!

On Friday, K had to deal with some luggage issues so I spent the day by myself on the beach. My $7 investment in an innertube proved well worth it as I spent my time floating out in the crystal clear waters with the fish and surfers. I met back up with K to buy some Malibu Rum and pineapple juice so we could sip it on the balcony while blaring Jimmy Buffet on the Ipod speakers. We had dinner at Duke's then joined the crowds on the beach to watch the sunset as the sky released a misty rain that felt great on our tanned skin. For the most part, that marked the end of our time in Hawai'i.

Hawai'is "most notable": The people! The natives were so friendly and welcoming. Obviously, tourism is huge in Hawai'i, but they go beyond that. It's as if they want you to truly understand and get to know their culture. "After all, cousin" they say "you are family."

The Sun'll Come Out Tomorrow!

2007-07-31T10:14:00.000-04:00

Too bad I won't really be seeing the sun tomorrow since I'll be on planes all day long. However, when the sun comes out Thursday, I'll be there to soak up those rays on a beach in Honolulu. For the next six weeks, I'm on vacation. A real true vacation. The book-reading, magazine-perusing, people-meeting, beachy-tanning, nighttime-dancing, cocktail-drinking, cultural-touring, picture-taking, just-plain-relaxing vacation! I'm not sure I even know how to handle all this. Have no fear, I'll figure it out. Probably before Thursday night's Paradise Cove Luau.

I will try to keep y'all posted along the way, but quite honestly, only if it does not interfere with any of the above listed activities. I do love y'all, but right now, I love me more. :-)

And now, I'm off for my trip of a lifetime!

For those of you who have inquired:
August 5-17 in Australia where we will visit some wineries, cuddle koala's and snorkel in the Great Barrier Reef.
August 18-23 in Thailand where we will ride elephants, go on rafting tours to see floating markets, visit palaces and watch a Thai drag show.
August 24-27 in India where we will visit friends and friends of friends and the Taj Mahal.
August 27-30 in Dubai where I will be in architectural/engineering heaven and we'll go dune bashing then visit a Bedouin campsite for camel rides and henna tattoos.
August 30-Sept. 9 in Istanbul (not Constantinople), on a cruise around the Greek Islands, then a few days in Athens.
September 10-13 in Egypt checking out some pyramids.
Then I guess we'll come back home.

Decompression

2007-07-28T08:29:00.001-04:00

Wow.

As one of my dear friend's away message says right now "there are no words." There really are not. But I'll try. I've been decompressing and talking things over with other fellow bar exam takers and one thing is certain, we all feel pretty much the same. Since we won't get our results until October or November, there is an anti-climactic feel to being finished. I mean, I'm "done" as in I don't have to study every day or go to classes anymore. But I'm not "done" as in I'm a lawyer. I don't know if I passed the Bar Exam. For the first time since this hellish 8+week process began, I honestly don't know. All along, I felt okay. I worked really hard, knew the law better than a lot of people and felt confident going in. Now, I really just don't know. That's a pretty unsettling feeling.

The VA Bar was every bit as bad as they said it would be. Day 1 was VA specific questions. The morning session was 5 essays at 36 minutes a piece. Of course, one can never know every single thing for such a comprehensive exam, but I felt pretty good. I spent my lunch sitting in my car with a good friend. We narrowed down what would be tested on the afternoon portion and reviewed for an hour. Then we made the mistake of saying out loud that it wasn't so bad.

The world got turned upside down when we went back inside. The afternoon session consisted of 4 essays (some with a few subparts) and 20 short answers. I hammered out the short answers in less than 10 minutes and settled into the essays. It was like entering the twilight zone. As if they gave us an exam for another state. For 2 of the 4 essays, I stared at my blank screen for quite some time. In some instances, I honestly had no clue what the law was. None. Other times, the questions were worded in ways that I had (well, still have) no idea what they were asking of me. When faced with questions like this, I could do one of two things: I could ramble on and on just laying out every piece of law I could think of or I could just make up the law. Well, I did a little bit of both. I sure hope I get points for creativity on some of those ethics laws I invented.

I walked out of that afternoon exam and for the first time this summer my spirit was broken. The VA Bar broke me. I went to dinner with some friends and did something I usually never do. We talked about the exam. I mean an all out "what did you put?" conversation. It came to light that of the four of us sitting at the table, none of us put the same thing. We all made up laws. We all rambled on. We all stared at blank screens. Between the four of us, we still couldn't figure out what some of the questions were asking of us. At least we were all in the same boat, even though it did seem to be sinking.

The next day was the Multistate Bar Exam. That one was a little less intimidating going in because I had already done two practice run-throughs and also countless practice questions over the summer. I'm not quite sure how I felt about it except to say it was pretty much exactly what I expected. I didn't think it was especially difficult, nor did I think it was especially easy. It was just what I expected. The thing with those 200 multiple choice questions is that I never can tell how I did until I turn around and score myself right afterwards. Well, they didn't let us do that, so I guess I have to wait. If I performed as I have been averaging all summer, I should be okay. I just have to hope that it was well enough to overcome my performance on Day 1. I guess only time will tell.

I really am in a state of limbo right now. I'm sure this will fade over the next few days and I will definitely leave these feelings at home when I travel around the world! I do predict they will resurface around October and I can deal with them then. Because at least for now, I'm done with the Bar Exam.

Done

2007-07-26T15:47:00.000-04:00

I just wanted to drop a quick note and thank everyone for the calls and emails and texts and well wishes and prayers! The Bar Exam is over. I survived (as in: I did not die halfway through). As for whether I passed, that's a question I cannot answer...until October. I'm still trying to decompress and process all of this. but will try to put together some thoughts tomorrow for those of you who keep checking in. As for now, I'm off to indulge in sangria by the pitcher.

All I'm saying

2007-07-24T20:54:00.000-04:00

VA Bar Exam afternoon session:

(that's the clean version)

July 24, the first day of the Bar Exam

2007-07-24T06:42:00.000-04:00

It's about that time.

I may or may not have gotten any sleep last night, I have been pacing around my hotel room reading notecards since before the sun came up, and my stomach is somewhere on the first floor (I'm on the third). I do know one thing for sure: I'm going to be okay.

On my way home from my friend's hotel after dinner last night, I snapped a picture.

That's a mountain. And that's a star at the top of the mountain. Take that how you want it, but I'm taking it as a sign from the Big Guy that I'm going to be okay.

Good luck to all!

2007-07-22T00:47:00.000-04:00

Things are about to get crazy. Before they get too bad and there is not time left for the internets, I just want to take a moment to wish everyone the BEST OF LUCK on their respective Bar Exams. It's been a long long long climb, but we are almost to the top. I have enjoyed having each and every one of you by my side (from the couple of Californians, the New Yorker, the drunk Chicagoan, the gal down south a bit, and my favorite former-local.) I am glad I decided to continue blogging for a little while because this little online network we made for ourselves has proved to be quite fruitful. Special good luck nod to Zuska and Stare Decisis and Faith and of course MEG, who were here pre-Bar Exam (back when it was regular law school stress).

I also want to wish a SPECIAL GOOD LUCK to those of you who, despite not having your own blog, have been following along at home. I have appreciated your comments and your reading. More importantly, I am glad you felt you had a place to vent and share in the misery.

See all of you at the top!

I just keep climbing.

2007-07-20T23:49:00.000-04:00

I wake up each day and stare up at this huge mountain I am climbing. As the hours tick by, the reading continues and the notes get organized, the essays get worked and the checklists and notecards get crafted. All of this aids me up this mountain. Every time I think I have made great progress, I realize that I have merely scaled a cliff or a big rock. Only but a fraction of what I need to climb. The rest of the mountain awaits. And so, with enthusiasm in tow, I keep going. With every large rock scaled or cliff I lift myself upon, I stand up. I take a breath. And I just keep climbing.

As I stare up toward the sky, I know this mountain will end somewhere. In fact, I know exactly where it ends, but from where I am, it seems so far away. Every so often, I get discouraged by the seemingly endless climbing. It's then that I take a moment to look down and check my progress. Even squinting, I cannot see the faintest image of the ground below. I realize just how very far I have climbed. That gives me the strength I need to turn around and keep just keep climbing.

I reflect on everyone that climbs this mountain. I gain respect for those who have already reached the top and I know that soon, others will being their climb. I turn to the side and lend a hand to those who are struggling with me. Being a part of such a perseverant group of people gives me the motivation to just keep climbing.

I am exhausted. I have known from the beginning that this climb would be about endurance. But I'm tired. I feel like I have been climbing this mountain as long as I can remember. But I do know that it ends. I do know that there is a peak to this mountain and that I will get to it soon. I know that when I do, it will be the most amazing view ever. I know that it will have been worth the climb. But for now...for the next few days...I just keep climbing.

Good ole days

2007-07-18T22:12:00.000-04:00

I recall being a child in math class and the teacher laying on us the concept of greater than (>) and less than (<). I remember thinking "oh gosh, how will I ever remember that. It's so hard to keep straight." Then, my teacher said you just think of the symbol like pac-man...and he's eating in the direction of the larger of the two numbers.

Yeah.

I sure do miss that simplicity.

How I am coping

2007-07-18T17:26:00.000-04:00

What is working for me right now...

being at a house on the Potomac River in southern Maryland, far away from my friends and fellow bar exam-takers

studying for 16 hours a day with intermittent (short) breaks for occasional bathing

eating everything in sight (yeah, that's going to come back to haunt me soon)

not really blogging about the daily roller coaster of thoughts that have taken over my entire being

cutting back on my bar-exam-taker blog reading because some of you guys are really stressing me out!

belting out the lyrics to Whitesnake's "Here I go Again" or singing "All by Myself" with Eric Carmen as loud as my little heart desires

reflecting on where I will be in two weeks from today. then the week after that, then the week after that, etc.

making piles of notecards, multistate books, VA Subject books, notes, checklists, yellow legal pads full of law, to do lists to revel in all that I have done (while NOT thinking of things I have yet to do)

taking time every single evening to watch the sunset

late night wine drinking

2007-07-16T23:27:00.000-04:00

One week left boys and girls.

The Tunes of the Bar

2007-07-13T22:11:00.000-04:00

I think we should start a Bar Exam Playlist. Wanna help? This is what I have so far:

Meet Virginia (Train)
I Will Survive (Gloria Gaynor)
Nothing Else Matters (Metallica)
Take it to the Limit (Eagles)
I Won't Back Down (Tom Petty)
Nothing Can Stop Us (Saint Etienne)
Keep the Faith (Bon Jovi)
Turn the Page (Bob Seger)
Far Behind (Candlebox)
Livin' on a Prayer (Bon Jovi)
Is there Life Out There (Reba McEntire)
Sick of Myself (Matthew Sweet)
Misery (Soul Asylum)
Down in a Hole (Alice in Chains)
I'm so Lonesome I could Cry (Hank Williams)
Ain't No Fun (Snoop Dogg)
How Much More? (Shaggy)
Battered Broken (Jude)
Cruel Summer (Bananrama)

What can you add?

And yes, I fully recognize the progression of misery that has been my summer.

Addin' to the List:

I Fought the Law (The Clash)
Help (Beatles)
Stuck in Moment (U2)
Under Pressure (Queen and David Bowie)
Don't Panic (Coldplay)
The District Sleeps Alone Tonight (Postal Service)
Can't Stop Now (Keane)
Hit Me With Your Best Shot (Pat Benetar)
Have You Seen Me Lately (Counting Crows)
Where Does the Good Go (Tegan and Sara)
You Learn (Alanis Morissette)
Brain Crack (Tracy Bonham)
New York State of Mind (Billy Joel)
New York, I Love You, But You're Bringing Me Down (LCD Soundsystem)
Going the Distance (Cake)
Bloody Mother F***ing A**hole (Martha Wainwright)
All Star (Smashmouth)
Hang On (Guster)
Rehab (Amy Winehouse)
Drink with Me (Les Mierables)

Watch yourself

2007-07-11T14:11:00.000-04:00

The following things, if said in my presence at any time in the next few weeks, are likely to get you stabbed:

In the grand scheme of things, it's not that big of a deal, it's only the bar exam.

You have two whole weeks, that's plenty of time.

Oh, it can't be that bad.

You look stressed. [Or alternatively "You look tired."]

I think you need a break.

Did you mean to leave the house looking like that?

I'm going to fail the bar because I have only done 1,846 practice questions and I only got a 150 on the practice MBE.

My morning so far...

2007-07-10T10:01:00.000-04:00

Convo with myself...
Hmmm, my left eye is blurry.
Why can't I see out of my left eye?
Crap. (blink blink).
Maybe my contact is dry. (insert rewetting solution).
It's still blurry.
Maybe there is something on my contact. (looking in mirror).
Okay, I can't tell.
Damnit, I'll just take it out (looking in mirror and playing with left eye)
Law-rah, you are an idiot, your contact is gone.
Look again (pulling eyelid in all directions)
Nope, just gone.
Dummy, maybe that is why your eye is blurry.
Just put a new one in (grabbing disposable contact and putting in new left one)
Hmmm, still blurry.
Now, it feels really funny too.
Just take it out. (pulling out contact to find there are actually two contacts in my left eye now)
Law-rah, you really are an idiot.

Convo with PMBR (sorta)...
Me: Hi, I'm taking the Barbri 3 day course and wanted to see if I could change my date.
Her: What? Your taking what?
Me: The Barbri 3 day course.
Her: I don't know what that is.
Me: (realizing I'm on the phone with PMBR) Oops, sorry. I meant the PMBR 3 day course.
Her: The what? I don't know what that is either.
Me: I'm scheduled for July 13, 14 and 15 for the PMBR course.
Her: Let me check the schedule.
Me: (waiting)
Her: We don't have anything on the schedule for those days.
Me: (confused) Are you sure? It's at Georgetown. Could you check again.
Her: What did you say this was again?
Me: Wait, is this PMBR?
Her: No, this is [insert company name that is in no way affiliated with the bar exam].
Me: Okay thanks. (Yep Law-rah, you are an idiot.)

Convo with the lady at the Egyptian Embassy...
Me: (after calling for over an hour) Hi, I'm coming in today to get a visa and I had a few questions.
Her: Visit our website at www.egyptembassy.net
Me: I did. Your hours are not posted on the website.
Her: 9:30-1pm
Me: Okay, I have one more question.
Her: Visit our website at www.egyptembassy.net
Me: I did. That's where I got this phone number.
Her: Click on "visa" if you have questions.
Me: I did. The answers were not there. That is why I am calling.
Her: Are you sure you visited the right website? w-w-w-dot-egypt-embassy-dot-net?
Me: Ma'am, I have been on the visa section of your website all morning. I got the right phone number and application but I still have a question that is not answered on your website.
Her: Click on visa.
Me: YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME! WHY WON'T YOU JUST ANSWER MY QUESTION? I'LL JUST GET THE STUPID VISA UPON ENTRY INTO EGYPT. (click - hangs up on consulate woman)
(Law-rah, while you may be an idiot, at least you are not as stupid as her.)

Stressed much?

Bubbling

2007-07-06T09:15:00.000-04:00

This is going to sound like a really stupid insignificant question, but this is where my mind is these days...and it kinda matters to me.

On the actual Multistate Bar Exam answer sheet, are the bubbles to fill in actual bubbles going vertically like Barbri's...

Or are they rectangles going horizontally like PMBR's?

I ask because three times in the last 100 PMBR questions I have darkened in the wrong answer choice even though I knew the correct answer. I have never ever ever had this problem before. I am meticulous when it comes to bubble-darkening. And this is NOT a problem I need to deal with on the Bar Exam. I can only assume my brain does not work in rectangles going horizontally.

Yes, I do realize there are more pressing things to worry about these days. I want to worry about the shape of the bubbles damnit!

Bar Exam woes

2007-07-02T16:26:00.000-04:00

You know the bar exam is getting closer when...

You have absolutely no idea what today is. And when someone tells you, you still don't know what tomorrow will be.

You cringe at the words "paced program".

You spend every day experimenting with various forms and timings of caffeine-intake trying to find a balance between awake enough to get stuff done but not so jittery you cannot sit still.

You realize that from here on out, everything can wait until after July 25: friends, bills, oil change, doctors, sleep, bathing, gym. Okay, maybe not bathing.

Obnoxious terminology has infiltrated your daily conversations: "Look, I don't know what happened, but I'm pissed and res ipsa tells me it's your fault."..."Seriously, you are such an eggshell plaintiff!"..."That happened so long ago, the statute of limitations for you to bring this up to me has already run."

You realize Conviser is your friend. No seriously, he is. You find that you write him notes all day long like "help me Conviser" and "Conviser I need you". You also realize you have spent more time with him in the past few weeks than you have with any of your local friends.

Your friends' away messages say things like "This is one long race", "Make it STOP" and "Dear Bar Exam: suck it!"

When you turn on the television for background noise in the morning and Jerry Springer is on, you find yourself sitting down to watch it, because hell, anything is more interesting than studying at this point.

You look back at the girl you were a few months ago (the girl that was looking forward to studying for the bar exam) and you want to stab her with a highlighter.

All growd up

2007-06-29T07:23:00.001-04:00

Today marks my 30th year on God's green earth.

To celebrate this milestone, I will be taking a simulated bar exam from 9am to 4:30pm. Woo-hoo!

After recovering, I will be in Chinatown indulging in a few adult beverages. Cause I'm an adult now.

On second thought...nah, I think I am always gonna be this kid.

2007-06-28T11:14:00.000-04:00

Dear Self-Important Asshat at the Indian Embassy This Morning,

You poor thing. The way you were treated at the consular's office was really just abominable. I mean, the nerve of them making you wait in line with all of us commoners! I did notice your frustration, as did everyone else waiting patiently in that line. We felt bad for you, really.

I quite liked the little routine you were doing and I was just surprised it didn't work. How did it go again? Oh yes...sigh loudly, lean on the chair to your right, then to your left, sigh, pull out blackberry and make phone call, put blackberry back in pocket, sigh, push your sleeves up one at a time, shuffle papers, sigh, pull out blackberry and send email. I really have no idea why that didn't make the line go any faster. I mean, you repeated the routine a few times even mixing things up a bit. Perhaps next time if you sigh a little more that would work.

Oh, and to top things off, the nerve of the woman at the window! How dare she not accept your visa paperwork because you didn't have two photos stapled to it. I mean, this tidbit of information is only available on the website, the checklist, the signs in the room, and inside the big empty box on the front of the application reading "STAPLE TWO PHOTOS HERE." How were you supposed to know that the photobooth when you walked in actually served a purpose? I mean, to make you get out of the line and properly finish your application before turning it in? Absurd!

Sir, on behalf of all of us peons, I really do apologize for any inconvenience you encountered. It was such a pleasure spending 45 minutes of my morning with you,
Law-Rah

Perspective

2007-06-24T15:04:00.001-04:00

Every so often, you get a comment on an older post that means more than anything currently going on in your life.

How to handle Chemerensky

2007-06-20T14:09:00.000-04:00

I had been warned about this guy. I was told that I would sit in a classroom for 7 hours over two days while he regurgitated the outline he had memorized (an outline I have printed in front of me). I find this method of learning doesn't suit me very well.

The first main problem is the "reading straight from the handouts" issue. I find it a general waste of time to be given the information in hard copy and then sit for four hours while someone reads it to you. Someone who speaks at a muuucchhhh slowwwwer paaaaace than it takes you to type.

Second problem is that while I do appreciate the effort to organize the information into outline format, I need that to be in my computer, not in a 44-page handout sitting next to my computer. Over the next few weeks, I will be learning the law in this outline by bolding, highlighting (possibly re-organizing) and condensing the information. That is not so easy to do in "workbook" form without using scissors and Elmer's glue.

I was really dreading today. I figured if nothing else, I could hopefully make some progress during class typing in the 44 pages of notes. I wanted to give Chemerensky a chance but knew I could always leave and type my notes up at home. Upon arrival, my very best Barbri friend in the whole wide world gave me a digital copy of the the very handout sitting next to me. I spent the next four hours with Chemerensky in the background reading* while I bolded, highlighted, and condensed that outline already in my computer. Got the notes down to 10 pages and now get to take tomorrow off. That, my friends, is how to handle Chemerensky :-) Oh happy day!

*To give the man credit, he doesn't actually read the outline...because he has all 44 pages memorized.

Girl Therapy

2007-06-17T10:19:00.000-04:00

When I was younger my mom used to go to "therapy". She'd usually come home intoxicated. You see, it wasn't the usual kind of therapy with a doctor and a sofa. It was girl therapy. She and the ladies from her softball team would get together once a month or so and have their therapy sessions. I never knew exactly what went on, but I knew it involved wine and giggling and a bunch of ladies getting away from their lives for the evening. I knew it was important to my mom.

And now, I have realized how important it is to me. I have a couple of friends that I get together with monthly to play poker. There's food and drinks and cards and only the four of us. This is a fairly recent tradition in my life but last night made me realize just how important it has become to me. These monthly evenings with these gals has become my girl therapy. I knew this summer was going to be stressful and I would have to give up a lot of social events, but I also knew that poker night is one I would not be willing to do without.

So last night I took time away from life to go to therapy. We feasted on yummy foods and even more yummy vodka concoctions; we talked about boys and who should stay and who should go (consensus: the Chanuck is the only one worth keeping); we played some TX hold'em and made up rules as we went; we jammed to the best of Toni Toni Toni and danced our way to the restroom all night; we talked about everything ranging from duck-taped bras to tipping to mistress horses; we got quiet and serious over a couple of sad moments; we got right back up and started dancing. At the end of the night, after we cleaned up the strawberries and whip cream from the table, floor, and ourselves, we said our goodbyes. I realized I had not stressed about studying all night long. I walked away feeling refreshed and balanced and damn lucky to have found such great friends who have given me my very own means of girl therapy.

Is My Price Right?

2007-06-16T14:35:00.000-04:00

Okay all you travel buffs...I need some help again. Since everyone was so helpful last time, I figured I'd put it out there again (keeping in mind I've lost a lot of readers since then because my life has become boring and filled with Bar study). We have been working diligently to make our post-Bar Exam trip happen (and by "we" I mean our travel agent). I have never used a travel agent before nor have I traveled so extensively. I just want to make sure we are getting a good cost. The following is the current itinerary and I would love to know approximately what folks think this should cost. I should note that I have no intention of divulging what we are actually paying in this public forum. Rather, I just need your input so I know where our projected costs are falling.

Flight to Hawaii + 3 night stay in Honolulu (Waikiki Circle)
Flight to Sydney (Australia) + transfer from airport to hotel + 4 night stay (Holiday Inn Darling Harbor)
Flight to Cairns (Aus) + 5 night stay (private room in a hostel)
Flight to Brisbane (Aus) + 3 night stay (with ex boyfriend - so should be free)
Flight to Bangkok (Thailand) + transfer from airport to hotel + 3 night stay (Century Park)
Flight to Chiang Mai (Thailand) + 4 night stay (Suriwongse)
Flight to New Delhi (India) + transfer from airport to hotel + 3 night stay (Hans Plaza)
Flight to Dubai (UAE)+ transfer from airport to hotel + 3 night stay (Flora Grand)
Flight to Istanbul (Turkey)+ transfer from airport to hotel + 2 nights (Ottoman Imperial) + full day guided tour of Istanbul
6 night Cruise from Istanbul (stops in Mykonos, Kusadasi, Rhodes, Santorini, Piraeus) end in Athens (Greece) + transfer from cruise port to hotel + 2 nights (Apollo) + 1/2 day guided tour of Athens
Flight to Cairo (Egypt) + transfer from airport to hotel + 3 night stay (Amarante) + full day guided tour (including Pyramids, Sphinx, etc.)
Flight back home.

Including all of the above flights, hotels (all with breakfasts), hotel taxes, cruises (with meals), three day-tours & transfers to hotels...how much do you think we should expect to pay? What about for just flights alone?

Basic Non-Moron-Behavior Tips

2007-06-15T13:33:00.001-04:00

Dear Girl that Sits One Row in Front of Me and One Seat Over,

You are really starting to annoy me. Okay, truth be told you have annoyed me from day 1, but the closer we get to July 24, the less I feel like putting up with stupid sh*t. You see, I feel like at this point in our (post law school) adult lives, there are certain amounts of classroom-etiquette we should just know. Oh no, darling, this is not me being unreasonable, this is you being a j*ck*ss.

Okay, the entire row behind you gets that you have some odd fixation with your own hair. Fine. I've seen girls twirl, tie, chew, brush, etc. However, there is never a need to flare your long mane out to the side, then the other side, then flip it backwards, then put it in a rubber band...only to take it down and repeat 2 minutes later. Then again. And again. While I am not keeping observed scientific records, I think I counted 14 times yesterday...during a 3 hour class. Unnecessary.

While the hair thing is annoying, the stretching is even more bothersome. All of use are sitting in the same classrooms for extended amounts of time each day feeling the need to stretch out. That is why we have a ten minute break every hour. To stretch. Now granted, there may always be a need for intermittent stretching. Fine. But really, do it with a little less disruption, will you? If your arms are stretching in a manner that results with your finger in a position to pick the nose of the girl behind you, then you are doing something wrong. Try stretching forward into your own damn personal space.

Don't get me started on when you do the mane-flipping in conjunction with the stretching. If my friend is finding your hairs on her space bar, again, you are doing something wrong.

I apologize (no I don't) for the tone of this email, but I must say that if the other 100 people in the room know this basic etiquette, I don't see why I should have to explain it to you.

Your BarBri Classmate,
Law-Rah

P.S. If you think I'm annoyed, you should hear from my friend who sits behind you. All I'm saying is that when I offered to bring some hair-cutting shears to class, she said there was no need, she would simply pull it out next time.

A few threads short of a sweater...er, pants

2007-06-13T07:34:00.001-04:00

Oh man, how did I not hear about this already?

Pearson, who apparently side-lines as a lawyer/judge, is suing a DC neighborhood drycleaner for a lost pair of pants...to the tune of $54 million. (I should note that he reduced his initial claim of $65.) Of course the concept in-and-of itself, while frivolous, is quite amusing. More amusing, however, is reading about the trial so far:

...Pearson, an administrative law judge, broke down while testifying about the emotional pain of having the cleaners give him the wrong pants. It was before an 89-year-old woman in a wheelchair told of being chased out of the cleaners by an angry owner. And it was before she compared the owners of Custom Cleaners in open court to Nazis....

Seriously, the guy had to take a 5 minute break to dry his tears during his testimony about his pants. If you have a spare moment, I recommend reading Emil Steiner's live blog of the trial.

I think the craziest part is Pearson seems to actually believe that he is representing every resident of DC in his quest to become a millionaire off of a mom and pop Korean drycleaner. Today is cross-examination which is the defense's opportunity to impeach Pearson's credibility. Oh this should be good. Seriously, why else would someone work over 1400 hours on such nonsense if he wasn't a little "off"?

Thanks for the head's up, DCSC!

Off-Balance

2007-06-12T07:50:00.000-04:00

I feel like I'm losing control. Not in the "I'm in the middle of the ocean with no one around and the water is rising over my head" sorta way. More like the "I'm sitting on the roof of the building at the local trash dump watching the bulldozer move things around and load up the pile that use to be my life into an unrecognizable heap" sorta way. I knew the end of law school would bring about changes. I love change. I used to re-arrange all the furniture in my apartment at least once every six months so it felt "new". Well, I usually love change.

For some reason, the bulldozer's act of taking from so many other piles and dropping it onto my formerly organized pile is really getting me unsettled. Each of the changes in isolation are good things (or at least not bad) and easily handleable. But taken together, I'm beginning to feel a bit overwhelmed. Good friends are becoming distant friends, weekly friends are becoming daily friends, contrasting personalities, merging worlds, learning at a different school with a lack of familiar faces, completely changed study habits, new living situation (I love you, V), and I have no time for the people I need most right now. Did I mention I am taking the bar exam in a couple of months then am embarking on an entirely new career? Again, bring on one or two of these, and I wouldn't blink an eye. Taken all together, I feel like an outsider looking into my own trash-pile-o-life.

I really need my groove back! Just not sure how to do that.

I'm all cashed in

2007-06-08T14:15:00.000-04:00

Somewhat symbolic of the actual end of law school, I cashed in my Lexis Nexis and Westlaw points last week. Yep, I've been accumulating points for three years for using websites that I really had to use anyway. Hey, that's cool with me.

Lexis sent me some really sweet speakers for my Ipod:

And hopefully, my Westlaw goodie will come in soon as well:

These make me very happy. Much happier than the envelope I got in the mail yesterday talking about the (over) $160,000 in loans that I must begin paying off soon. Hey, at least my neck will not be tense and I can crank up the volume to drown out the sobbing as I write those checks.

50% ain't bad considering...

2007-06-05T13:23:00.001-04:00

Dear BarBri (who needs to get your sh*t together),

I am a bit angry and confused with you right now. You taught me criminal law and criminal procedure for the Multistate portion of the Bar. This is the NON-state-specific part. Okay, got it. Learned it. Worked lots of questions.

Then, you gave me a graded practice crim. law essay to do last week. You told me how important the practice essay was to determine my progress and abilities. I took it seriously. I "studied" first. I timed myself. I wrote in "CRAC" format.

I got my grade back today and your grader told me that my defense is not actually available under Virginia Criminal Law. Furthermore, my grader asked me why I didn't discuss arguments the Commonwealth would bring up.

Um, well...could that possibly be that I worked this essay LAST WEEK and we will not learn Virginia Criminal Law until TOMORROW?

Morons.

Irritated at your inability to schedule,
Law-Rah

P.S. I'd also love to know why your "Average Grades and Common Errors" online that are allegedly specific to OUR essay are actually the grades and errors for the Civ. Pro. essay, which we have not done yet?

P.S.2 To answer your question...yes, they do my friend:-)

Ruining my Ipod

2007-06-04T18:05:00.000-04:00

My playlists have transformed from Study Music and Beach Mix to Criminal Law and Evidence. Yep, I loaded up the PMBR CD's onto my Itunes. (For those non-Bar Exam takers: PMBR is one of the two large companies that fight for our attention and charge way too much money to teach us what we need to know for the bar exam.) While Barbri gets my daytime attention with actual classes, PMBR gets my nights since they gave me notecards, practice books, and most importantly, CDs.

My friends, I am ashamed to say I feel like I hit a jackpot with these CDs. They're like books-on-tape of the law! Everything you could possibly want to know about the federal rules of evidence and contracts and torts. Oh the joy. Jealous? In all honesty, it is a nice little break to put a playlist on my new Shuffle and listen while I cook, workout, clean, etc. I am not sure how much I am actually retaining, but if nothing else, it takes away those pangs of guilt when god forbid I take a breaks to eat or walk to class or some other non-studying activity.

Okay, off to start evidence. Itunes tells me it's 5 hours and 30 minutes long. Going to be a fun night.

How to ruin ice cream...

2007-05-31T23:39:00.000-04:00

Offer to make homemade ice cream to cheer up a down friend.

After she chooses cherry (over lemon), head to the kitchen with the recipe book.

Take out the bowl and spend well over 30 minutes (de)pitting the cherries (with love).

Follow direction leaving last few steps until you get to friend's house.

Later, when you are ready for ice cream, begin hand whipping the cream.

Continue while another friend judges your whipping abilities.

After your arm gets tired, pass the whipping off to other friend.

When other friend gives it back to you so you can finish, continue whipping and forget to pay attention because you are engrossed in the really bad dancers on some reality tv show.

Look down and realize the cream you were whipping that was supposed to be thick and creamy is now thick and chunky.

Put all the ingredients in the ice cream maker and hope it all turns out okay.

Watch the looks on your friends' faces as they attempt to swallow the spoonfuls of frozen curdled cream.

Call friend's man and have him pick up ice cream on his way home.

Moral of the story from Baking911: If you whip too long, the cream can curdle and separate. That's because prolonged beating has warmed the cream.

Semantics

2007-05-30T16:49:00.000-04:00

Can someone tell me why I chose to take the Bar in a state that uses such antiquated language on the exam? I realize that I am taking one of the more "formal" Bar Exams in the country (as noted by the demand that I wear a suit to take the test), but this nomenclature is getting ridiculous.

I don't think you should be able to just claim an existing word like "committee" as your own by pronouncing it differently (ko-me-tay) and making it mean something completely unrelated (guy who steps in for the mentally incapacitated).

And motions "craving oyer"? Really? Old legal terms are Latin. This one is half English, half French-ish, and wholly unneccessary.

Call a summons a summons and a complaint a complaint. No need for calling things "summons" in one court and "notice of motion for judgment" in another court.

Is this just for the Bar and just in my state or is this how I will start speaking once I become a lawyer? If so, can I count it as a second language?

The perfect day for our paths to cross

2007-05-28T21:49:00.000-04:00

When I was a child, I joined my grandparents on my first ever trip to Washington D.C. Somewhere near the Vietnam War Memorial, I purchased one of those silver bracelets of a Marine Missing in Action. As a kid, I didn't think of the commercialism or touristy nature of those bracelets. I merely thought of the guy whose name was on it. I wore that bracelet for a while when I was younger and often wondered how my Marine went missing and if he had ever been found. This was in the pre-internet age, so I would not have even known what steps to take to figure that out. Instead, I just kept him in my thoughts and prayers until the day that I put that bracelet in a box somewhere and forgot about it and about him.

Two days ago, when the cable man was here, he needed a phone to test out our new phone line and I recalled having an old cordless in a box in my closet. As I dug through the box, I came upon my MIA bracelet. I took it out and put it on my desk to think about later. After a long day of errands and studying, as the sun was setting through my window it reflected off the bracelet and caught my eye. After almost twenty years, I put the bracelet back on. I reflected on my Marine; only this time, I took it a step further. I googled his name and found his story.

My Marine's plane went down in 1969 on my father's birthday (I recall choosing this particular bracelet solely for the date.) He was never heard from again, however, he was not lost forever. In 1999, they found parts of his plane and some remains of (presumably) him and his co-pilot in Laos. After careful excavation, they brought my Marine home. They laid him to rest right down the street from me in Arlington Cemetery.

As I looked down at the bracelet on my arm, I thought of the fact that I have lived here for almost six years and have not visited the cemetery. I thought of the fact that my Marine was from Washington state so his family is likely still far away. I thought that I should really find some time in my oh-so-busy life to go pay my respects to my Marine. As I pulled out my study schedule, I noticed I would have no class on Monday. It took a moment to dawn on me that Monday would be Memorial Day. I sat breathless for a moment. Memorial Day.

There could be no more fitting a day to meet my Marine.

Today I put my books aside, put my bracelet back on, and went to meet LTC Luther A. Lono. After picking up some flowers and a good friend, we headed to Arlington Cemetery. When I arrived at his gravesite, I felt as if I knew him personally. As I placed the bouquet of red, white and blue flowers at his headstone, I thanked him for serving this great country, for dying for my freedom, and for helping at least one American to truly understand what Memorial Day is about.

Barbri weekend woes

2007-05-27T08:17:00.000-04:00

My birthday falls on a Friday this summer. My birthday never falls on a Friday. Additionally, my birthday is special this year 'cause I'm turning 30. Wow, I haven't changed decades in like, um, almost 10 years. You may be wondering what I will be doing for my 30th birthday. Brace yourselves: I will be taking a simulated Multistate Bar Examination from 9am to 4:30pm. Good freaking times, huh?

While I am excited about being able to check my progress mid-way through the summer, I am a little less excited about spending the Saturday and Sunday immediately following my birthday in a classroom. I have heard mixed ramblings about the weekend-long wrap up; some say waste of valuable time because you can just read the answers and some say really helpful. Anyone have advice one way or the other?

(I know it seems a little far out to worry, but I heard a few rumors about a friend or two wanting to plan a big shindig and I just wanna know if I need to quash or downgrade their plans early on.)

Bar Prep Week 1

2007-05-24T15:12:00.001-04:00

Yeah, so, um, I couldn't do it. I tried, I really did. Beanie was right...there is no damn way I am getting through this summer without a written outlet for whining about the Bar Exam. Dear lawd, I already have three days worth of pent up Bar-related "stuff" and it doesn't fit into my pretty work-in-progress outline and I'm pretty sure no one wants mass emails of my daily Bar trials and tribulations. In fact, WonL readers probably don't want it either, so I hereby deem this blog to now be "WonL: The Bar Edition." If it does not interest you, you may wanna move along because I do not foresee it getting any better. But this is for me, not you:-)

So, I am taking a BarBri summer course in preparation for the Bar Exam. Although I have always hated the BarBri monopoly and all it stands for, I cannot fathom how anyone could be doing this on her own. After a WHOLE LOT of money changed hands, they gave me ten or so books with outlines, questions, answers, charts, practice exams, etc. Every day, I have four-ish hours of class and daily assignments that are a part of a "paced program" they have set up for me for the entire summer. They tell me what to read, which problems to work, what to organize, etc.

All I have to do is follow their instructions and retain the information. Easy, right? HA! According to their paced program, when I get home from class everyday I should be putting in between 5-9 more hours of work. Then, I should spend 10-12 hours on weekends. They say to "treat it like a full time job." Is it too late to just get my MBA?

Honestly, I am on track for week one even though I haven't been putting in the full time they request. However, I have also only had three classes, all of which I took in law school (Criminal Law, Criminal Procedure, and Federal Jurisdiction & Procedure). We'll see how I feel when we start in on the things I have never heard of like Commercial Paper.

I have noticed a few things in my first week of classes. First of all, for the past three years, everyone has said that BarBri will teach me what I need for the Bar and I will not learn it in school. Thus far, I must disagree. So far, BarBri is refreshing what I found I already learned. I am realizing that I must have really gotten a good education because this stuff stuck somehow. (Yeah, Kerr, that means you too.) I have also found a tiny bit of respect for BarBri. The jovial, energetic professors on tape do this really great thing: they tell you what the VA Bar Examiners have consistently tested over the past 15-20 years and they focus on that. No wasting time on things that have very little chance of appearing on the Bar. I like that. I like that a lot!

Okay, back to reviewing my lecture notes.

Feels good to be back for a little while :-)

That's a Wrap

2007-05-17T13:00:00.000-04:00

Dear Pre-Law School Unsolicited Advice Giver,

You were wrong.

You told me that it would not be worth it and you were wrong. In more ways than I can expound, law school has been worth it. When I cross that stage on Sunday and receive my diploma, I will be reflecting on just how worth it these past three years were.

You told me that it would be the most miserable three years of my life. Granted, it was a lot of work. It was grueling and intellectually tiring and sometimes even emotionally exhausting. Still, it was far from miserable.

You told me that law school would turn me into a negative cynical person. Well, I still wake up every day smiling. I am still happy with the decision I made. I still look forward to the challenges ahead of me. Oh, and any cynicism present was already in me.

You told me that I would not make lasting friends because law school students are cut-throat and competitive. Actually, it was quite the opposite. I got close to some of the most intelligent, supportive, downright amazing people I have ever met. I found people that I can truly call friends...friends that will stay with me forever.

You told me that having a law school blog would be a waste of my time. Wrong again. WonL has kept me sane during the past three years. I would not have gotten through things in the same way if I did not have this outlet. I have cherished everything that WonL has brought into my life and I will miss it. Now it's time for Law-Rah to become Laura again.

Farewell,
Law-Rah

P.S. If I ever decide to come back in another blog-form, I'll be sure to give y'all a head's up. Thanks to everyone for reading these past three years!

How to unwind

2007-05-14T06:48:00.000-04:00

What happens when a bunch of law school students gather in this house in the OBX for an entire week before they graduate?

Well...

Unicorns run wild.

Beer-amids are erected.

Lighthouses are climbed.

Power hour is played.

Foosball men learn to dance.

Cheesy t-shirts are purchased.

And most importantly...friendships are forged.

Heading out

2007-05-05T07:26:00.000-04:00

Add a couple more chairs some adult beverages and 14 of my closest friends who just finished law school...that's where I'll be unwinding. See y'all in a week!

Looking back for a moment...looking forward forever.

2007-05-03T16:56:00.000-04:00

I just finished law school. I mean, I just turned in my last paper and...oh my gawd, I just finished law school. I knew this day would come, but at the same time, I never dreamed this day would come. I'm sitting here with a glass of champagne reflecting on all that it took to get me here. These feelings are familiar. Turning in that last paper brought me back to another time. Another accomplishment. Another glimpse into me:

So many words could describe the emotions I encountered in those ninety minutes. I had always been dramatic and this was just another performance, although there was much more riding on this than any play or dance recital. I was also filled with excitement and anticipation of showing everyone what I had accomplished over the last five years. It all boiled down to the one-hour I had to express to everyone the thoughts and ideas that drove this project. I was so overwhelmed thinking of all that I had gone through to get here, and how close I came to not making it. It had been a long road, but today was my chance to shine.

I glanced out over the familiar faces in the room. I stood there, my stomach in knots and my hands shaking in front of professors, local architects, and classmates and I began to present my thesis. Everyone in that room knew how much work I had put into this project and, more importantly, how much was riding on it. This pass/fail presentation would determine my degree. With my emotions riding high, I spent an hour trying to get everyone in that room to see things through my eyes. After completing my presentation, I stepped outside to allow the panel to decide my fate. Never had seven minutes lasted so long. As I attempted to distract myself from the swelling anxiety, I began to reflect upon how I came to stand outside that classroom.

Architecture school was the first thing in my life that did not come naturally to me. This whole new way of “thinking outside the box” was a foreign concept. After breezing through high school, barely opening books, I figured college would be the same. I was wrong. When I entered architecture school, I went from being the smart one, to being the one that just could not get it. During my second year of architecture school, one of my professors actually pulled me into his office to tell me I should think of pursuing a different degree. He told me, “this field is not meant for everyone; some people never get it.”

I stood there, frozen in disbelief. I had never ‘not been good enough’ for anything in my life. I had never even come close to being faced with the thought of quitting. I decided at that moment that there was no way I was going to be a part of those that just never got it. From then on, I was determined to do whatever it took to prove to everyone, including myself, that I could accomplish whatever I set my mind to.

Over the three years that followed, I went through a growth process I could never have anticipated. I spent countless all-nighters weeding through projects and drawings with mounting frustrations, pulling back on my social life and missing holidays. I also learned that professor’s critiques were tests of endurance and persistence, both of which I needed to build up. I realized just how hard I had to work to get through this. But more importantly, I realized that I had it in me.

The minutes continued to inch along as I stood outside that classroom waiting for the Director to come and reveal my fate. I remember every feeling leading up to that moment, but cannot remember the moment itself: the moment I received “the handshake” that meant that I had passed Thesis and would be graduating with a Bachelor of Architecture. Little did I know at the time the true meaning of that handshake. It did not necessarily mean that I would become a world-famous designer, or someday own an architecture firm, or even enjoy working in that field. It meant that when dealt this challenge, I handled it with enthusiasm and determination. Receiving that handshake acknowledged the transformation I had made into a more committed and hard-working person and it meant that I was now ready to conquer anything that came my way. I needed to go through those experiences in architecture school to become the person I am today: a person who is truly prepared for this next challenge. I am not only ready, but I also firmly believe that my undergraduate experiences will help me to excel as both a law school student and someday, as an attorney.

That’s the letter I sent to GW Law school (in the form of a personal statement) over three years ago. Apparently, someone over there believed in me because they gave me a chance. More importantly, in a few weeks, they will be giving me a diploma. Because ladies and gentlemen, I got my law school handshake today.

Ready for my first one...

2007-04-30T09:24:00.000-04:00

...with time to spare (only because it was not until this morning that I found out that the 9am exam I've been preparing for is not until 2pm.) Okay, I'm off to re-read my outline for four hours!

Ain't she pretty?

Exam-state-of-mind

2007-04-27T08:04:00.000-04:00

I have an exam on Monday and an exam on Tuesday. Today is Friday (although I just found this out)...and I have already lost all ability to function.

I have not been able to type properly or in coherent sentences for days. (This one took me F"OUR tries.)

Yesterday, I found myself writing letters to myself on a notepad because I bought pretty new pens. I love bright colors. Now I have "Laura B. loves her new pens" written over 25 times in bright colors sitting next to me.

I got in a fight with a bug yesterday. (An actual crawly bug.) He crawled a wee bit too close to my coffee. Curse words were yelled.

I woke up in the middle of the night, TV on, VCR still playing. I apparently cannot tell reality from non-reality because when I heard Alex yell "quick, get Dr. Montgomery-Shepard!" I ran out of bed to go get her.

I have been in my pajamas for five straight days. Granted, I have showered here and there. Then, put my pajamas back on.

Normal cycle: shampoo, rinse, condition, rinse. Yesterday's cycle: shampoo, rinse, shampoo, rinse, shampoo, wait, what the hell am I doing?

I mailed off my bar exam application/character and fitness questionnaire yesterday. Somewhat anti-climactic considering that as I was walking home flipping through the copy I made for myself...I realized I did something very wrong. Today, I will have to call the VA Bd. of Bar Examiners, then likely have to send a notarized update/correction.

Yesterday, my roomie approached me with "hey, I don't mean to bother you while you are on the phone"...to which I replied "oh, I'm not on the phone. I'm just having very loud conversations with myself." And I was.

I get really annoyed when I get to the bottom of a box of cereal and there is not enough for a bowl...yet too much to just throw away. This has happened a few times lately. To remedy the situation (and so as not to waste) I just indulged in a bowl of Honey Nut Chex/Special K Strawberry/Shredded Mini-Wheats. Yum.

UPDATE: If you make yourself a fresh cup of coffee at 10:30 on a Saturday night, then settle back into the same seat you have been for seven days...you should make sure to first remove the other coffee mugs that have accumulated in your sacred work space...lest you accidentally get a really nasty jolt of cold ?-day-old coffee.

Letter to my nephew

2007-04-25T20:37:00.000-04:00

Dear Ezra,

I know we haven't met yet but I do look forward to the day that changes. I feel like I have so many things to tell you right now that I don't know where to begin. Most importantly, I just want to say that I am sorry. I am so sorry that things are the way that they are. I know you are too young to understand, much less even realize what is going on, but I also know that you will someday. And it will probably hurt.

When it does, little guy, feel free to turn to me because it's been hurting me for over ten years. I may not know how to deal with it and I may not understand it, but I live it and I feel it.

I spent years watching all of the drugs and the lying and the stealing and the hurting. Like everyone else, I hoped and prayed each time my brother went to rehab that it would be the last, that he would finally realize what he is doing to himself and to his family. Over time, the more I held onto those hopes, the more painful it was when he crushed them again. As the years went on, the tears began to dry up. The sadness turned to anger and then to numbness. There came a point when I just couldn't take it anymore. Maybe it was selfish, but to protect myself, I walked away. I had to. I have not cried for your father in years.

Until now. But these tears tonight aren't really for him. These are for you, little guy. I am so glad that you joined us in this world, but I must be honest with you. I have been terrified from day one that he is going to hurt you too. And here you are, not even four months into your life, and he's in rehab again. You surely do not deserve this. If I could take you in my arms, and protect you from all of the hurt that you may one day experience at his hands, I would. Without missing a beat, I would.

If I thought praying or hoping for a change in my brother would do any good, I would clasp my hands and hold on for dear life. But my heart gave up on him a long time ago. Instead, I will pray that you don't ever have to experience the hurt that the rest of us have. I pray that you always know how many people around you care about you. Regardless of what the future with your father brings, you are one loved little guy and I cannot wait to meet you.

All my love,
Aunt Laura

I am resourceful

2007-04-25T09:44:00.000-04:00

Pretty strained right now trying to wrap up this insanely detailed character and fitness questionnaire by the end of today (not to mention two exams and a paper coming up).

Yeah, and I thought listing all of my places of residence would be difficult.

I also have to disclose any traffic violations. Considering I had to get official driving records from every state I ever held a license, you would think that the traffic violation part wouldn't be hard. Um, except that my first ever speeding ticket was a long time ago and is no longer listed on any record. I was advised that even if it is not listed, I need to disclose as much information as I can about the incident including: location, date, etc.

Here is a testament to how my resourceful little brain works step-by-step:

I got the ticket driving down the boulevard in my neighborhood when I was a youngin'...

I recall having an argument with the policeman because he kept accusing me of speeding to deliver pizza on time...

I explained to the policeman that while I was in a pizza restaurant uniform with a box of pizza beside me, I merely worked there and was not delivering...

Hmm, okay, when did I work at the pizza place?...

I know it was sometime during high school because I was dating high school boyfriend at the time...

HS boyfriend used to show up and bother me at work...

Oh yeah, there was that one time he showed up and made me cry and my cute co-worker named Philip made him leave...

Yeah, I remember Philip. He was the first (and thankfully only) person I ever knew to commit suicide...

I wrote a poem about Philip when he killed himself...

I used to write dates on all of my poems...

[digs through old file folder of childhood poetry]

And that, my friends, is how I figured out the approximate date of my first "traffic violation" for disclosure on my Bar application.

Ma and Pa

2007-04-19T09:15:00.000-04:00

I called my mom last week and simply said "so I just wanted to call you and thank you and dad for never getting divorced."

I'm pretty sure my mom thought I was crazy, but hey it would not be the first time.

Watching as a close friends goes through a divorce and hearing many people around chime in about experiences with parents divorces growing up, I realized how blessed I am. I have no such stories. I cannot relate. I am honestly glad I have nothing to contribute to those conversations.

I know my parents had to work through stuff in my younger years. Of course, as a child, I was likely shielded from most of it. I had a great childhood and my parents were together through it all. They worked at it, they fought for it, they stuck it out. Over thirty years later, they are still together and happier than ever. I am in awe of the place they have come to in their relationship. What they have in each other is truly an inspiration. Each of them has found in each other a person willing to fight with and fight for a really great love. That's a rare find. Today marks THIRTY THREE years for those two lovebirds.

Mom and Dad, I sure do love you!!!

What are the chances?

2007-04-16T13:26:00.000-04:00

As I was getting dressed for school this morning, I had the news of the Virginia Tech shootings on in the background. One person dead. My first thoughts were of my cousin that goes to school there. Yeah, but what are the chances it would be him? I shrugged it off.

When I got to school and settled into class, I noticed the story on CNN.com said there were actually two shootings and one happened in an engineering building. My cousin is in engineering. Then again Tech is a big engineering school. Again, what are the chances, right?

A friend messaged me to tell me 22 confirmed dead. That's a lot of people. I'm getting a little nervous so I send a few emails to the family. Still, with 26,000 students, I am thinking what are the chances?

As time goes on and I get no word, I find myself getting really nervous. When I finally do hear from my cousin, I find out that the shootings took place in a classroom...the very classroom he was supposed to be in. My cousin was running late today. I took a moment to breathe a huge sigh of relief, as a couple of tears welled in my eyes. Then I clasped my hands a said a prayer of thanks. Because really, what are the chances?

New. Favorite. Reader.

2007-04-15T19:25:00.000-04:00

I have a paper due Tuesday that is currently sucking the life (not to mention creativity) right out of me! That means I have nothing interesting to say that does not pertain to how Syria was able to make reforms in their laws of personal status despite the alleged closing of the gates of ijtihad. Yeah, I figured you didn't want to hear about that. Instead, I will pass on what I believe to be one of the greatest pieces of writing ever that I received via email today.

(this comes from my new favorite WonL reader):

Hi Law-rah. I am currently in London for the week for work and wondered if there was anyone you might like me to pay a visit and send your greetings as in the way Michael Corleone said hello to people. Just wondering. Your wish, dear madam, is, as always, my command.

Yeah, that is just fabulous.

My day went wrong already

2007-04-13T10:31:00.000-04:00

Plan...
1) Get a full night's sleep.
2) Wake up and have some coffee.
3) Drive to Jiffy Lube and leave my car for an oil change.
4) Walk across the street and get fingerprinted at George Mason Law school (needed for the bar).
5) Walk a block and settle into the coffee shop for some coffee and read 5 articles that I printed that will hopefully help me finish my paper.
6) Walk back to Jiffy Lube, get my car and be home in time for lunch.

Actuality:
1) - 3) Worked out quite nicely.
4) I did walk to Mason but when the police officer asked me for ID I realized I left my wallet at home.
5) Realize further implications of a lack of wallet means no money for coffee and no money to get my car back from Jiffy Lube.
6) Walk home. It's only about a fifteen minute walk but since I did not foresee being outside much today, I am coatless.
7) Upon returning freezing to my apartment complex and getting onto my elevator, I realize my keys to get inside are still with Jiffy Lube.
8) Whine to the front desk and get spare keys.
9) Come upstairs, pour half a glass of Shiraz and breathe.

Okay, let's try this again...

Round-the-World Trip

2007-04-12T14:53:00.000-04:00

Okay, we met, laid out maps, reviewed emails and WonL comments and I think we have a pretty good first draft of our trip planned. I'd love to know if anyone has any thoughts on any of these places!

(3 days) Hawaii - not sure where yet, just want to break up that brutal flight to Australia...besides: getting lei'd and sipping mai thais...sign us up!

(12 days) Australia - Sydney, Brisbane, Hunter Valley for winery tours, Dubbo for sleeping in a zoo, then heading north to Cairns for some snorkeling/scuba diving on the Great Barrier Reef. Since it will be winter over there and downright freezing, we are going to skip Melbourne and New Zealand

(7 days) Thailand - Phuket, Bangkok and Chiang Mai

(4 days) India - Agra to visit the Taj Mahal and possibly New Delhi

(3 days) Dubai - amazing architecture/construction (including indoor Ski slopes) and good shopping and beaches too

(7 days) Greece/Turkey cruise - Santorini, Mykonos, Rhodes, Istanbul, etc.

(7 days) Egypt - Cairo

(5 or so days) Antigua - after Egypt, my traveling companion has to return home for a wedding. However, my cousin just got into medical school in Antigua so I'll keep going.

Unbroken

2007-04-10T22:23:00.000-04:00

As she walked back from meeting him at the notary she called with tears in her eyes. We positioned the car and opened the door so she wouldn't have to face anyone she knew. She said "it's just hard." We knew it would be a hard day. All we could do was be there to pick her up when she broke down.

We drove her to the courthouse so that she could file papers to divorce her husband. I sat outside in the car and waited for her. I could not begin to fathom how she felt. I imagined the recent hurt I felt walking away from a relationship of only six months. I tried multiplying that by sixteen and adding some sacred vows. I still could not fathom. I knew it was only a matter of time before she broke down.

As she returned to the car, I tried to gague her. I couldn't tell. I asked if she was okay and she looked straight at me. In that instant I could see so much hurt. But the hurt I saw was slowly fading into the background as the relief took center stage. "Yes, I am okay." She wasn't smiling, but she wasn't broken.

We stopped at my place to pop open some champagne and toast to new beginnings. We brought out gifts we had bought for her to attempt to rebuild some of what was "lost" in the divorce. We tried to do anything we could to lessen her pain, as we waited for the moment when she would just break down.

Five hours later, she took a call from her mom to tell her how today went. As she left the room, I reflected on the strength of my friend. I have always been a strong woman, but I would have broken down hours ago. She was still standing. Beautiful and kind and strong and inspirational...she was still standing. Whole. Unbroken.

I am pretty sure that when the lights go out and the room is empty and silent she will finally break down. But I can only hope that she knows how much she is truly loved and that helps her get though those moments.

Easter (the Adult version)

2007-04-09T09:05:00.000-04:00

Did you think by that title you were gonna hear about some sort of "mature" Easter experience? Not so much.

We still had an Easter egg hunt.*

And a bunny cake.

And a coloring contest.

We just did it all with wine.

*note: This photo was staged later as the blog author was too busy crawling on the ground looking for eggs to take a photograph at the time.

104.1 you are dead to me

2007-04-06T16:03:00.000-04:00

I don't listen to the radio much and there are two main reasons for that. First, I am rarely in my car so I usually just listen to the Ipod on the Metro. My second reason is that, in my humble opinion, DC radio just plain sucks.

Things used to be okay. There were enough stations to flip through when one got especially chatty or played a crappy song. When in doubt, I could always rely on 104.1. Until one fateful day when I get a frantic phone call from my roommate. "Oh my god" she cries "are you near a radio? Turn it on! I don't know what happened. Something happened to 104.1!" I turned on the stereo and sat on the phone with roomie as we heard some sort of classical music being belted out of our beloved Z104. It just switched. No warning. No notice. Poof. I hopped online to find such a nice "farewell" on their website. They politely tried to direct me to listen to a few other stations. I tried. I really did. It just wasn't the same.

Until recently.

I was alerted that 104.1 was back. It was now called "George" but it was back. And better. Over the past few weeks, I have re-programmed my dials and fallen into old habits of turning on the radio. It felt nice. Today I was running some errands in my car while the 104.1 guy was chatting it up on my radio. I somewhat tuned him out but clearly heard the last thing he said "...signing off." Then fuzz. I clicked away and back. Away and back. Just like that. Gone. Yet again, 104.1 has broken my heart.

I heard the rumors but refused to believe them...that 104.1 was going off the air to be replaced by Gospel music. Well, it seems to be true. What I didn't get was why would they resurrect the style of 104.1 for only a tiny amount of time, as if to tease me or something. Again hitting the internet for an explanation, I found this ploy uncovered on George's website. The website tells me that George is just not going to be on the radio anymore but I can still listen...on High Definition Radio. Wait, so this tease was actually intentional?

George, you cannot seriously think that your ridiculous ploy to get me to buy an HD Radio would work. Am I really supposed to say "wow, I got so addicted to the 70's and 80's music you teased me with this past month that I must have more...no matter the cost!" Can you hear me saying that, George? Because I cannot really hear me saying that. I should tell you that, in fact, I will erase your 104.1 from my dials and charge my IPOD back up. From here on, 104.1, you are dead to me. I mean forever this time.

Update: I should mention I am getting quite a few readers who arrive here by searching "what happened to 104.1 George?" Dare I say that I am not the only upset one?

Let's play a game

2007-04-06T08:30:00.000-04:00

...called "help me plan my bar trip". That would be the trip after I complete the bar exam not a trip to random bars. Believe it or not, this stumps some people. Anyway, I wrap up the Bar at the end of July and don't start working until the end of September. This leaves plenty of travel time to exotic destinations. My friend and I have some general ideas of places we would like to go but now we are ready to get specific and start planning our trip.

We definitely want to go to Australia. I already emailed the ex-boy in Australia for advice. He responded "what kind of experiences do you want (i.e. skiing, scuba diving, camping in the Outback, wineries, city hoping, spend the night in a zoo, etc)". I'm feeling pretty confident he will hook us up on the Oz front.

We have a strong desire to go to a few North African places (including Egypt and Morocco).

The guy who came to look at Bug's bed highly recommended Thailand (not just Bangkok but also much more south like Phuket.)

We also thought Greece would be a great place to explore.

Ideas? Thoughts? Suggestions?

Share my moment

2007-04-02T09:17:00.000-04:00

I had a moment this weekend. You know, an "I am so lucky to be in such an amazing place" moment. Share my moment:

I am in my car heading into D.C. from a haircut in Old Town. I'm in a happy mood because I always enjoy my salon visit. My stylist is wonderfully fun. I met him at a party in D.C. a few years back. He and I ended up sipping adult beverages on a sofa while I tried to pick out who was gay and he told me if I was right or wrong. Fun times. I thought for a moment about all of the people I have met here and all of the very random connections they have lead to. I love that about this city.

My windows are down and my new favorite radio station 104.1 is blaring. I have always loved the drive along the George Washington Parkway, but today seems especially beautiful. I pass the marina on my right and wonder how long it will take before I have a boat in there. I do my best "that's my boat" Forrest Gump impression and then giggle at myself.

Driving on, I am coming up to Reagan National Airport. I could not begin to count the number of times I have flown in and out of that airport in the past six years. I lived in Louisiana for twenty-four years and could count on one hand how many times I traveled from there. There is something about D.C. that brings out my love for travel. I am not sure if it's the people I have met or the accessibility and ease of traveling from here. All I know is I am currently planning a six week trip around the world that will include Australia, Africa and Asia and every person I met this weekend had a recommendation based on somewhere they have been or somewhere they think I'd love to go. As I pass the airport, I think of how much my fellow D.C.ers love to travel.

As I keep driving, I pass the Pentagon. For almost six years now, every time I have passed the Pentagon I remember that day. I remember smelling the burning as I walked across the bridge. I remember the candlelight vigils and bonding with strangers. Although I hate that 9-11 happened, I have always said I am glad I was here for it. I experienced a solidarity and patriotism in D.C. that changed me.

As I approach the Arlington Memorial Bridge, I brace myself. Some driver will inevitably not know how to handle the circle and someone else will swerve and there will be honking. This time, though, is smooth sailing. I veer right and pick my lane. I turn off the radio and listen to the sounds of D.C. I spend the short drive over the bridge just breathing in that view. Breathtaking. The sun is reflecting off the Potomac on both sides of me. The statues at the end of the bridge stand tall to let everyone know when they are entering and exiting D.C. I cannot see Mr. Lincoln ahead of me, but I can surely see the monumental white building in which he sits. And I see tourists everywhere. I'm not annoyed or upset though. I feel proud. I feel proud that so many hundreds of thousands of people are coming to see the beauty of my city right now. And it sure is a beautiful city. My city.

I met a few new people this weekend and one conversation somehow turned to past relationships. I mentioned that my last relationship was long distance. Someone said "yeah, those are hard because you get to a point where one of you has to decide who will leave to be with the other one." I smiled and said "that was actually never a problem. He knew I was not willing to leave here. I think I have found home."

If you are in D.C. and have a moment today, I recommend you enjoy your moment. I enjoyed mine.

On that note, I'm off to enjoy this glorious day with tens of thousands of other prideful D.C.ers to cheer on our Nats to an ~~opening day victory~~. [hey, we tried]